Pseudo-Random Poe Generator Using random sentences from a WWGHA Theist

[HAL]

Does the pseudo-random post I composed below, make any less sense than any other post from a theist? It was composed using totally random sentences from my chosen theist member - Dominic. I assure you each sentence was from a different post -

"God has revealed to certain humans some aspects of 'his' nature, knowing that humans will only ever have partial understanding. No-one can fully understand God. Those who pray to Lucifer believe in God with certainty. God is something that is far beyond human comprehension. There is one God. Different religions interpret this God in different ways. These are things for here and now which can be achived through gaining an understanding of God.

The Church created a book called the Bible and a large number of Christians have forgotten about the Church and have now given authority to the book instead. However, that's not the most important thing.  More important than that is that God knows what is important and what isn't whereas the person praying often doesn't. Atheism claims to be aligned with skepticism ie 'I don't believe without evidence' rather than dogmatism ie 'I categorically insist that it is not true'.

Your attitude is totally understandable. However, there is still the possibility that all your past prayers will be answered. What we usually do when we pray is that we put conditions on the prayer, often without knowing it.  So Christianity makes these bold claims to you - If you wish to and you pray humbly, then you will see all your pets again and your Nan and they will all be in perfect health forever. I have used my own words but that is the Church's official position to the best of my knowledge."

[dloubet]

It's alive! IT'S ALIVE!!

Nope, I can't tell the difference.

You shouldn't have told us how it was produced. Just present it as something a theist said to you. Then when you've suckered us in, reveal the trick. That way you'll know if it's good or not.  :-)

[Barracuda]

Just present it as something a theist said to you. Then when you've suckered us in, reveal the trick. That way you'll know if it's good or not.  :-)

Lol, it'll be like the theist version of the turing test.

[HAL]

Nope, I can't tell the difference.

Of course you can't. It makes just as much sense to compose a theist post with random sentences of theirs as it does for one of them to post it themselves.

You shouldn't have told us how it was produced. Just present it as something a theist said to you. Then when you've suckered us in, reveal the trick. That way you'll know if it's good or not.  :-)

I could make a new account, and post as a theist using random sentences from existing theist members and you wouldn't know the difference either.

I am next going to compose a post from random sentences from random WWGHA theists and see how it reads. Stand by for that next.

[HAL]

Second attempt, using the following members -

Dominic, John McCray, lawlips, Sunol, I love jesus, CatholicCanadian, JesusIsLordofAll, Spinner198, Fran, and the mailbag,

I have constructed my second Pseudo-random theist Poe post. I must say it turned out better than I expected (or worse, depending on who you are). Whereas the first one was random posts from one member (Dominic), this one is random posts from many members, and yet who can really tell?

Every single sentence (not paragraph) in this post is a random selection from random posts from the theists above - yet it reads essentially no differently than most other theist posts. See if you can spot which theists wrote which sentences. I left in all the misspellings, bad grammar, and hurtful comments so other theists can observe how many of their group talk to us.

This Poe example consists of two parts, Part 1 follows.

*****

PART 1


"I apologise for the randomness of this post but writing is not one of my strongest abilities. I am an educated Christian, and none of your questions made me uncomfortable. Most atheists, agnostics, and even professing Christians do not fully understand the truth about Christianity as defined by the Holy Bible. First of all, God would not heal on our command; He would heal for His own purposes. Secondly, when a statement is made about the morality, justice, and such, of an act of God, you must have a standard by which you judge morality and justice to say so. You must have faith when dealing with god. I am just trying to give inspiration for you to make a wise decision and try to ask God the same thing this man asked. I have removed anything from my life that does not glorify God (xbox, tv, most movies, most of my old cd's, buying new things, any wanting money and possessions, saving money, reading too much worldly news, etc.)

This forum is prejudice against Christian believers. If the Bible was not from God, then I dont believe it would make any special spiritual God connection for us. The "goat herders" were humble so they would be the perfect person to write the scripture on paper. Is the Bible an all or nothing book ? I only said that for those who’ve never heard of Jesus or the Law or the Bible or God… the Bible teaches that they will be judged by a different criteria… one of those being the conscience. That is good, sound reasoning skills and approach... and this is how historians and lawyers and scientists work. Almighty God is a very, very loving God and would indeed heal all sick, lame, and amputees, if it were not for the simple reason that he is a 'just' God and must by His own nature, 'judge' the sins of His creation man as well!

I am wondering if the author of this website is claiming that Jesus Christ did not exist. It's obvious to me that you've either never talked to an intelligent Christian or you've completely blown us off. Do you believe God exists? There will never be evidence that definitively proves or disproves the existence of a deity or deities. God, I believe does act through history, but generally He does not interfere with the exercise of our free will. Now… If God is fair, then he will take into account that you are sincere, and if you are mistaken and sicnerely searching for the truth, He will work with you if you are interested in learning from God. I could sit down with most Christians and we would agree on the most essential idea: Christ as the only way to God. I am perfect because Christ has made me perfect. God is a healing God insomuch as He heals hearts and brings Life to the ultimate problem of death."


PART 2 will follow this evening (complete with the hurtful ending :'() ...

[pianodwarf]

When I was in college, I came across a program that did something similar for Immanuel Kant.  It was called "Kant Generator Pro" and produced much the same results; telling the difference between a genuine Kant passage and a KGP was sometimes easy enough, but other times, it was quite difficult.  (Kant was a smashingly brilliant man, but he was a terrible writer.)

[peterofthecorn]

It doesn't really look like random selection of posts. Is it actually random, or are you actually picking which sentences go where?  (For example, I thought it unlikely that a "secondly" sentence would follow a "first of all" sentence if it was actually selected randomly.)

[HAL]

It doesn't really look like random selection of posts. Is it actually random, or are you actually picking which sentences go where?  (For example, I thought it unlikely that a "secondly" sentence would follow a "first of all" sentence if it was actually selected randomly.)

It's random in that I picked the sentences as randomly as I can being a human and not a computer. Sometimes I got more lucky than others, like the "secondly" example you saw. But yes, they are random sentences. Amazing isn't it?

Wait till you see Part 2. 

[Ambassador Pony]

I am, once again, in awe.

Some theists wonder why an atheist would want to post on a discussion forum for unbelievers. The behaviour is so infuriatingly intriuging. 

[HAL]

LOL - I having a rum & coke waiting for the Superbowl to start and working on Part 2. Let me tell you, the alcohol makes putting Part 2 together all the more fun!

[HAL]

Again, even though it may read like a "real" post at times, every sentence was random, no two sentences ever really followed one another in any post on the Forum.

Enjoy!

PART 2

"I don't dispute that some Christians think that reason and faith are mutually exclusive. This goes to show more and more that you really have a problem with the people not with Christianity. Jesus says "I am the way the truth and the life. You don't need religion to be good and it doesn't matter if you are good because of it. That is, Christ substitutes His sinless life onto those who trust Him by way of the cross. I bow the knee to the Father as much as I possibly can daily. Also, I bet your secretly saying within you "I don't want Him to come. If He does, I'll hit Him into next week! All I can say is, read the bible, gain understanding.

Try reading with all your heart, mind, and soul. Our actions always have reactions. I don't know why God doesn't help starving people,but i know is his will, i've seen
thousands of miracles happen,people that have been cured of lepracy,or another horrible disease that it's impossible to live with. Listen up fuckers...I want you to answer this question. Can you believe that this exact system of the universe and all of these great creation will end in in nothing...just after death! Poor you, you are completely lost in life, you must be very unhappy , my brother, God forgive you!

So you know without any doubt in your mind that's what the scripture is to be interpreted as? It isn't a contradiction at all. We'll just leave it at the fact that you've failed to debunk it. The point is, in your heart, do YOU believe that everything that exist was just a random accident? We believe that we were given spiritual bodies yes, but we were already some form of intelligence before that. I always thought that once someone made up their mind that there is not a God and became a "dedicated atheist", then they will never go back, and near impossible to get them to except the Lord's forgiveness. There are many answers to the math equation 2+2, but only one answer. Will you choose to ignore the evidence? That means total and utter devastating separation from His love and mercy.

Jeeeeeeeeeeez it's like explaining Godel to a fish. Your saying that if god was real that he would be a nutter. I just have to know...were you ever raped by a priest? You are an atheist bitch, have fun getting ass raped in hell. Stop spreading lies. Jesus doesn't have to do what you tell him. You will see the day you die that you have made a grave mistake for thinking that God is imaginary when in fact he is very Real! So STOP QUESTIONING CHRISTIANS ABOUT WHAT WE BELIEVE IN. You will change your mind as soon as you die because you will be in hell...Jesus said so. I WOULD RECOMEND FOR YOU NOT TO MAKE A FOOL OUT OF YOURSELF, FIRST OF ALL READ THE BIBLE CAREFULLY NOT LIKE AN IDIOT WOULD.

Your atheist videos have gone too far, you have angered christians all around the world who watch your videos, including me, so stop it. Remember, Jesus and god love you, and its never too late to change so you dont have to spend eternity in hell! Times running out better ask BEFORE YOUR LEFT BEHIND TO SUFFER WITH THE DEMONS. If you choose to ignore this there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth for you. GOD has sent me to warn you.. not only are you hurting yourself but you are bringing other people down with you. Your pathetic and i hope to God you die the most painful death imaginable! You can take a sentence out of anything and use it out of context to twist it. I guess it's the bad thing about internet, any dumb fuck can put whatever they please and lead many more into ignorance.

I think that Ive gotten as far as Im going to get here on this forum. Why what happened to you? Who shit in a bucket and declared you embasodor?!?! We were never Monkeys or Fish. Atheist, the internet is nowhere were you should be spreading your blasphemy. Im going to assume that your mad at God because your leg was cut off. Atheist, hmm hmm hmm, I will not pray for them for they are disrespecting God so much that it angers me!! FUCK YOU. Yea maybe God dealt u a heavy hand but suckit up man. So dude go fuck your self bastered. SO WHAT IF THE BIBLE IS REAL OR NOT, NIGGA LIVE BYE THE TEACHING OF THE BIBLE AND HAVE A PROSPEROUS AND ENJOYABLE LIFE ! When you die, I want you to remember the moment you read my message. THE POER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!

I hope you live a fulfilling life because by the way it looks right now, it SUCKS. I now leave with this: god is real and he has to be!"

[Azdgari]

You need to make a program that does this automatically.

Then, you need to troll the mailbag.

[Inactive_A]

Triple facepalm.

[Azdgari]

This one is absolutely classic:

I think that Ive gotten as far as Im going to get here on this forum. Why what happened to you? Who shit in a bucket and declared you embasodor?!?! We were never Monkeys or Fish. Atheist, the internet is nowhere were you should be spreading your blasphemy. Im going to assume that your mad at God because your leg was cut off. Atheist, hmm hmm hmm, I will not pray for them for they are disrespecting God so much that it angers me!! FUCK YOU. Yea maybe God dealt u a heavy hand but suckit up man. So dude go fuck your self bastered. SO WHAT IF THE BIBLE IS REAL OR NOT, NIGGA LIVE BYE THE TEACHING OF THE BIBLE AND HAVE A PROSPEROUS AND ENJOYABLE LIFE ! When you die, I want you to remember the moment you read my message. THE POER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!

I wouldn't think twice about it, apart from a chuckle, on reading this in the Mailbag.

[Levan]

I dunno... the second one seems kinda forced. It's probably the spelling/punctuation level changing.

[HAL]

I dunno... the second one seems kinda forced. It's probably the spelling/punctuation level changing.

That's because the posts from the mailbag are the worst ones for bad grammar, spelling, and punctuation. If I had not used posts from the mailbag it would have been even harder to tell it was fake.

[Levan]

Come to think of it, why do those mailbag contributors have such bad grammar and spelling? And why do they litter question marks all over their posts?

[DI]

can you make one for atheists?

[HAL]

can you make one for atheists?

Randomly like the ones I made for theists? I don't think it would work nearly as well, because most atheists here speak in rational thought sequences and the sentences need to go together to make sense. Theists tend to speak more in pleasing-to-the-ear platitudes (to them)[1], so that's why random posts strung together sound just as good as the "real" thing.

You're welcome to try it though. But remember, if you have to cherry pick the atheist posts to make it sound realistic, that is cheating.

1.	Except for the mailbag, of course

[ReasonIsOutToLunch]

Sooooooo, I have a confession to make. I have only read a small fraction of theists posts. I read a couple early on when I came back to posting, they all pretty much sounded the same to me so, I figured if I read 3 or 4 I read them all. This proves my theory that they are all pretty much alike.

[voodoo child]

Come to think of it, why do those mailbag contributors have such bad grammar and spelling? And why do they litter question marks all over their posts?

Home schooling, and only one piece of literature to work from. I cannot remember, but is there any question marks in the bible?

Interesting Hal, theists are, robotic and unimaginative in nature. IE; imagine finding a watch and opening it up. it gives me a "casualty" to face-palm every time.  

no wonder some of our are responses feel tiresome.   edit; wine,hunt and peck stumble

[MadBunny]

can you make one for atheists?

You might be able to do that if you were to pick a specific topic that non-theists participate in a lot.  I'll bet that you'd have to pick something that people get emotional about, like homosexuality, abortion, or money.  Or maybe Nazis.

With the theists posts, thanks to the nature of the site a lot of them are already thematically similar AND a lot of the mailbag stuff comes from Youtube, the greatest source of mental retardation mankind has ever known.

[ReasonIsOutToLunch]

^^ I take it you have never seen an AOL message board.

[MadBunny]

I stand corrected. 
There apparently *is* more room on the bottom.

 

[Ambassador Pony]

question marks are theone from youtube, the coding gets translated that way, or something.

[Str82Hell]

my brother, God

[Eschaton]

Hal you godless rascal! Why does my boundless wisdom not feature in your list? True enough, I'm no resurrection-man, but am I not a defender of the high gods?

Illustration:

http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/forums/index.php?topic=8433.0

Mo - The Epicurean Curmudgeon

[HAL]

Hal you godless rascal! Why does my boundless wisdom not feature in your list?

You don't want to be in that list. Trust me, you really don't.

Since that was so fun, I'll make one with posts that only come from the mailbag. It won't be an example of Poe that could fool anyone though, this one will only be for pure entertainment. 

[godisimaginary]

yeah i see no difference.. bunch of babble.