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Main Discussion Zone => General Religious Discussion => Topic started by: carstensenscott on March 12, 2013, 07:34:33 PM

Title: Smoke signals
Post by: carstensenscott on March 12, 2013, 07:34:33 PM
Shouldn't the fact that these geriatric cloaks are giving smoke signals to communicate to the public be a launchpad for the news flash of the stupidity of religion?

Caveman communication, caveman logic. Caveman religion.

SHOULD BE EXTINCT!

And don't play like the catholics are the only practicers of barbaric logic. Really think about the implications.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: 12 Monkeys on March 12, 2013, 07:40:42 PM
Like molesting alter boys,it is tradition more than anything else I think.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: bgb on March 12, 2013, 07:47:45 PM
What do you think is really going on behind the locked door?
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Azdgari on March 12, 2013, 07:55:57 PM
To what exactly are you referring, carsten?
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Willie on March 12, 2013, 08:12:39 PM
They use smoke because they haven't discovered mirrors yet.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Nick on March 12, 2013, 08:17:15 PM
They should jump ahead a few centuries and use a plane that writes in the air with smoke. ;)  NO POPE YET , DOPE.

There is not one among the 115 cardinals that can save this church from itself.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: lotanddaughters on March 12, 2013, 09:11:21 PM
Buttfuckers.

Amen.


"Holy, holy, holy, Lord. God of power and might. Heaven and earth are full of your glo ho ho reeeeee(glory)! Hosanna . . . in the highest!!"(sung to "The Tune of the Dick Suckers")
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: ParkingPlaces on March 12, 2013, 09:52:37 PM
4th century thinking requires 4th century technology.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: rev45 on March 13, 2013, 10:00:33 AM
I would think that the idea of believing in a god being who decided to spread his message by oral tradition, followed by written words that are now only scraps of paper, all of which includes zombies, sorcery, and wheels covered in eye balls might be enough to make people think. 
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: stuffin on March 13, 2013, 10:57:54 AM
Just elect a new human conduit to god and get this shit off the front pages.

Unfortunately we will get a month of front page biographies when they do elect a new Poop Pope.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Hatter23 on March 13, 2013, 12:31:30 PM
I would think that the idea of believing in a god being who decided to spread his message by oral tradition, followed by written words that are now only scraps of paper, all of which includes zombies, sorcery, and wheels covered in eye balls might be enough to make people think.

Especially since it has been three generations since the atom has been split. Seriously Applied atomic science is now older than most of the member of Congress, yet here's America, a first world contry, where to say you don't believe in a God who spread his message by oral tradition, followed by written words that are now only scraps of paper, all of which includes zombies, sorcery, and wheels covered in eye balls, is political suicide!  &)
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Jontom10 on March 13, 2013, 01:00:12 PM
Why all the electing ?

Surely God knows who he wants to be his conduit on Earth and has in fact already decided as it is part of his plan. So why not just point a big holy finger through the window (can be done behind closed doors with the 115 cardinals so that the populace doesn't lose faith as they know he exists) and just say in a big booming holy "I Pick you pope-achoo"

Or just use another burning bloody bush or something. A burning nuns bush would be funny.

Maybe a message written on teh bare butt cheeks of whichever altar boy they are abusing in there ?

Pedoyahweh approves

Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Willie on March 13, 2013, 04:31:27 PM
... So why not just point a big holy finger through the window (can be done behind closed doors with the 115 cardinals so that the populace doesn't lose faith as they know he exists) and just say in a big booming holy "I Pick you pope-achoo"

Or, to further minimize the threat to faith, tell only the chosen pope, who then must declare that God told him he's the new pope. Inevitably there will be several others who also claim to have heard the voice of the lord. To resolve this, they can fight it out in a papal death match. God's chosen is sure to be the winner, and everyone's faith will be left intact, except for the new pope, who will surely be damned to hell after serving God for the rest of his days.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Willie on March 13, 2013, 04:33:57 PM
A burning nuns bush would be funny.

Not to the nun.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: nogodsforme on March 13, 2013, 04:43:54 PM
Now a burning George Bush-- that would be a sign of god.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: carstensenscott on March 13, 2013, 11:36:23 PM
To what exactly are you referring, carsten?

Thats pointed. I guess Im getting at the fact that a language so far removed from relevance (smoke signals) that it should be GONE. Lets all break out the abacus for completing this years taxes.

I loathe with every strand I am that some things no matter how ridiculously out dated the are stick around due to tradition and stubborn non-thinkers.

LETS ESTABLISH AND DEPLOY TECHNOLOGICALLY CURRENT TOOLS TO SOLVE WORLD PROBLEMS. AND RETIRE ALL THE OLD METHODS AND THOSE WHO REFUSE TO COMPLY. LETS START WITH THEISM's CLAIMS AS CREDIBLE AND HELPFUL.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Azdgari on March 14, 2013, 12:44:10 AM
Umm...what I mean is that I have no idea why this came up.  There's no news link anywhere in this thread, and I'm at a bit of a loss here.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Willie on March 14, 2013, 02:50:42 AM
Umm...what I mean is that I have no idea why this came up.  There's no news link anywhere in this thread, and I'm at a bit of a loss here.

It's in reference to the use of smoke to report the progress of voting on a new pope. Black smoke = still voting, white smoke = decision reached.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmiSZiPN0FQ
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Willie on March 14, 2013, 03:21:17 AM
I like the seagull's attitude towards all this. To him, the pope chimney's only significance was as a convenient place to rest up and pick off some parasites.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAkaoL1uu-E
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Nick on March 14, 2013, 03:55:27 PM
Foolish human...that's no seagull.  It is the Holy Spirit in the form of a Seagull.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: nogodsforme on March 14, 2013, 04:57:23 PM
Foolish human...that's no seagull.  It is the Holy Spirit in the form of a Seagull.
Okay, you made me do this, so on your head be it. And may the holy seagull "pass over" your Prius and anoint your fundy neighbor's Hummer.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rm2hYRQEOHM

The book was silly, the movie was cheesy, but the soundtrack was and still is the single most awesome thing Neil Diamond ever did. If he had only made  this one album and then quit showbiz, maybe I would still believe in a god....
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: William on March 14, 2013, 05:03:55 PM
This morning I woke up to the 'news' &) that: "... the pope has returned to his hotel to pay his bill in person ......"

How is this worthy of 'news' :-\  as if it's some indication of his style and humility.  He obviously just hasn't got used to all the butlers, servants, secretaries, security :police: , toe suckers, and angels now at his disposal.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Quesi on March 14, 2013, 05:45:46 PM
Well, it was a slow news day.  I watched CNN yesterday morning, and according to them, the only things going on in the world were the wait for the smoke, Valier Harper’s cancer, and the fact that Taco Bell has a new nacho cheese thing, but that it is not available in all Taco Bell locations yet.

So, The Pope Pays Hotel Bill seems like a reasonable follow up to a slow news day.

There were a few other stories of relevance yesterday and today.   The International Space Station got a new commander, and three astronauts returned safely to earth.  There is increasing evidence that life might have been brought to earth on a comet, and increasing evidence of water on Mars.  Detroit is about to explode.  Rioting in Brooklyn for the third night in a row, after a 16 year old kid was shot 7 times (mostly in the back, it appears) by police.  US immigration reform legislation is being drafted by the “gang of 8,” and there is this thing called a sequester going on.  Bombs exploded and killed people in Iraq and Syria and Pakistan, and probably a bunch of other places I don’t know about.  The stock market soared, but somewhere, somebody’s home was foreclosed on.  A lot of kids, in the US and around the world, went to bed hungry.  And on a personal note, I got an invite to attend a memorial service for Hugo Chavez at the Venezuelan consulate[1] but I had a conflict.  Oh.  And a local supermarket in my neighborhood locked out their union employees, and replaced them with non-union staff. 

Now that I think about it, nothing brings humanity together like the image of the pontiff displaying the humility of paying his own hotel bill. 
 1. not sure how I got on that mailing list, but I think it has something to do with a past relationship with the Bolivian consulate
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Nick on March 14, 2013, 06:30:26 PM
The pope also rode over to the hotel on a bus with the other carinals and got a cab to take him back to the vatican.  I bet those in charge of security are going to have a nightmare trying to keep him alive.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: 12 Monkeys on March 14, 2013, 06:48:09 PM
The pope also rode over to the hotel on a bus with the other carinals and got a cab to take him back to the vatican.  I bet those in charge of security are going to have a nightmare trying to keep him alive.
Who would want to KILL the Pope? ;)
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: Tonus on March 14, 2013, 06:57:28 PM
So, The Pope Pays Hotel Bill seems like a reasonable follow up to a slow news day.
On the other hand, "Pope pays hotel bill with coin taken from mouth of a fish he'd just caught" would've been worth changing the channel for!
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: DumpsterFire on March 14, 2013, 11:39:31 PM
Who would want to KILL the Pope? ;)

If, due to constant threat of assassination, the leader of your religion can only appear in public surrounded by bulletproof plexiglass, doesn't that pretty much prove that any god that may exist doesn't support your beliefs?
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: carstensenscott on March 14, 2013, 11:51:51 PM
If, due to constant threat of assassination, the leader of your religion can only appear in public surrounded by bulletproof plexiglass, doesn't that pretty much prove that any god that may exist doesn't support your beliefs?

Wouldn't it be nice.
Title: Re: Smoke signals
Post by: nogodsforme on March 15, 2013, 03:08:10 PM
Who would want to KILL the Pope? ;)

If, due to constant threat of assassination, the leader of your religion can only appear in public surrounded by bulletproof plexiglass, doesn't that pretty much prove that any god that may exist doesn't support your beliefs?
Where is god's protection? People specially chosen by god to lead deserve bulletproof vehicles. The rest of us schmucks can just take our chances. It does seem to be strange that becoming Pope increases your chance of being shot at. And if he is shot at, isn't it god's will?