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    Posts: 3664
  • Darwins +491/-9

There's a difference between acknowledging that a god could exist, and believing that one does. I'm in the first camp.

I'm not even stretching for an example when I state that I absolutely think Bigfoot is way more likely. And I don't believe in Bigfoot either.

As I said earlier, I defaulted to a very vague amorphous idea of God after I bailed on the church. Eventually, questions from my kids forced me to start dealing with the weird left-over bits and pieces of my former beliefs. I parted ways with as much of the negative catholic conditioning as I could, but I continued to shy away from examining what I did believe by staying focused on what I didn't.

Unvarnished truth: I was scared to face it. As long as I avoided actually thinking about what I had left I was fine, but every time a stray thought slipped in, it scared me. So I kept ignoring it. I kept telling myself I wasn't ready; in retrospect I was being a childish.

By the time I decided I was ready to examine what remained of my beliefs about God, it turned out there really was nothing left. What I had been afraid of for all those years was the idea of being truly on my own in the universe. I didn't even remotely believe in a participatory God anymore, and along the way, everything else had faded completely away.

And it felt great. In almost every single objective measure my life is better. It IS better in every subjective sense. I now delight in the idea that we are on our own, to succeed or fail as a species based on our own choices. It's liberating.
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Azdgari If MM is honest now, he'll say you're lying about this. April 17, 2013, 09:11:16 PM