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curiousgirl



    Posts: 886
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I know that I have not been posting on here as much as I did last year, so I wanted to share some of my thoughts with you on how becoming an atheist has truly had a positive impact on my life.

When I first came to this forum last summer, I was in crisis. Due to my deconversion, I found myself in the middle of a deep depression where I would drag myself through my day, and I had such a hard time getting much sleep. You guys were here for me. The members of my (former) megachurch had convinced me that life away from Christ was desolate, empty agony. I even believed at one point that I would rather die than give up God. However, upon conversing with some of you, I realized that it was possible to live a fulfilling life without any kind of god at the center of it.

Today, I am a much healthier person, physically and psychologically. I lost 10 lbs (yay!) because I was able to stop abusing my body from eating too much junk food (as a Christian I had thought that only the afterlife truly matters). I was able to deal with my depression and anxiety (runs in my family, and was triggered by childhood abuse that I suffered) without any medication anymore by taking control of my own life. No longer did I have to deal with the intense pressures and worries of trying to fit into the mold of "God's plan" or "God's will," so I was able to just be myself and figure out how to be comfortable in my own skin. I realized that although I love taking care of my husband and son at home, that I did not have to limit myself just because I am female, so I went back to school.

In retrospect, I realize how much Christianity truly hurt me throughout my childhood and early adulthood.  It limits your potential to grow emotionally, intellectually and socially as a human being due to its prejudices and traditions. Atheism did not turn me into a devil-worshipping, baby-eating witch. Honestly, I have more mental clarity as an atheist than I ever did as a Christian.

I think the world would be a much more loving and fair place if there were less Christians in it. Although I have reached a point where I am not angry at Christians or threatened by them unless they get in my face, I do think that, ironically, the words of Jesus actually apply to them: "they know not what they do." A Christian has to cherry-pick Bible verses and be (at least somewhat willfully) ignorant of ones that do not make sense in the real world. That being said, I do generally have compassion for them (unless they pick a fight or do something outrageous or unfair) because they are like fearful children clinging to their belief in Santa Claus. I do not say that in spite, because I feel a great sense of peace regarding my deconversion, and my bitterness toward Christians has faded. I will, however, express my disgust for that fictional character called "God," and anyone who does terrible things in his name.
Changed Change Reason Date
Dante Thank you for sharing! February 06, 2012, 05:36:11 PM
ParkingPlaces Surely a good conversion story is worth at least a point... February 06, 2012, 07:05:43 PM
Traveler beautiful. I'm so happy for you!!! :) February 07, 2012, 12:58:58 PM
The Wannabe That's great to hear! Really happy for you :) February 27, 2012, 04:46:16 AM
Benny *nods head in approval* June 08, 2012, 09:20:21 PM