You may not just visit on occasion. You have to be all in or concede defeat and admitt atheism is correct. Your home life is irrelevant!!!
But seriously, I came to my agnostic atheism through light review of the bible, personal observation of the world, and deductive reasoning through my own personal biases and knowledge.
I have concluded with almost complete certainty on my part that the christian bible can not describe a benevolent hands on God that some people describe. A hands on god seems unbelievable because it requires a superbeing with more character flaws then I have.
I think it is unlikely that a hands off god is required to create the universe and even if he did how am I to deal with a god who never makes himself known. Why should I believe in something that leaves no evidence of his existence let alone his desires.
So having deduced there is no credible book (because I don't believe the bible), and absence of any evidence, I can not believe in god.
About the only inkling left for me of a possibility of a god is the god of my absence of knowledge. Where did all this stuff come from defies my understanding of the universe. But is that enough reason to believe, and if so what am I to do with a hands off God.