Author Topic: A new flavor of Lunchables!  (Read 104 times)

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Online ParkingPlaces

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A new flavor of Lunchables!
« on: September 09, 2014, 06:15:03 AM »
Thought folks would want to know, especially if any of you are planning to start a new sect!

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00IL118R4/downandoutint-20

Of course, if they sell more of these than JC actually weighed, I'd have to question the authenticity of their claims, but I imagine just the catholics alone eat more than one Jesus per weekend, so maybe that isn't an issue.

I was of course happy to see that this fine offering on Amazon was good old christian bread, and not a cut down catholic wafer. Details like that are important to me.

And people still wonder why I'm not a cannibal christian.

Not everyone is entitled to their own opinion. They're all entitled to mine though.

Offline Mrjason

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Re: A new flavor of Lunchables!
« Reply #1 on: September 09, 2014, 06:49:35 AM »

Of course, if they sell more of these than JC actually weighed, I'd have to question the authenticity of their claims, but I imagine just the catholics alone eat more than one Jesus per weekend, so maybe that isn't an issue.


They eat 70995 jesus' any given sunday
« Last Edit: September 09, 2014, 06:51:32 AM by Mrjason »

Offline OldChurchGuy

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Re: A new flavor of Lunchables!
« Reply #2 on: September 09, 2014, 08:13:33 AM »
Thought folks would want to know, especially if any of you are planning to start a new sect!

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00IL118R4/downandoutint-20

Of course, if they sell more of these than JC actually weighed, I'd have to question the authenticity of their claims, but I imagine just the catholics alone eat more than one Jesus per weekend, so maybe that isn't an issue.

I was of course happy to see that this fine offering on Amazon was good old christian bread, and not a cut down catholic wafer. Details like that are important to me.

And people still wonder why I'm not a cannibal christian.

A little over 7 cents per cup.  As church attendance wanes and it is getting harder and harder to find volunteers for such mundane tasks, I can see where this could be popular.  Tearing the lid off might be a problem.  If this goes over well, I would suggest investing in dry cleaners or their equipment.

As always,

OldChurchGuy
Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle - Philo of Alexandria

Whether one believes in a religion or not, and whether one believes in rebirth or not, there isn't anyone who doesn't appreciate kindness and compassion - Dalai Lama

Offline kcrady

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Re: A new flavor of Lunchables!
« Reply #3 on: September 09, 2014, 06:53:46 PM »
From the description on Amazon:

Quote
...the first truly Protestant prefilled Communion Cup containing Christian Bread in a standard sized Christian Communion Cup that fits into a Christian Communion Tray.

Just so you don't get them mixed up with those Muslim Communion lunchables.  Accept No Imitations!

Quote
Complete Communion does not make you worship with small Catholic wafers made to fit into prefilled Cups

Twice as much Christian Breadtm as the leading brand!

Wait, are these guys implying that Catholics aren't Christian?  I love it when Protestants do that.  Its as if they've totally forgotten where their Bibles came from.  Also, I gotta say, I get a kick out of the way their ad copy is written like the script for a really loud radio/TV ad, complete with ALL CAPS.  Nah, let's not bother with any pretense of reverence or anything, just Go! For! The! SAAAAAALES!  "Now how much would you pay?  Don't answer yet, because each box of our Totally Christian Jesus Christian Not Like Those Stingy Catholic Communion Lunchables comes with a Bible Action Figure toy in every box!  But wait, there's MORE!  Buy ten boxes, and you get this lovely set of John the Baptist kitchen knives!"   :laugh:

Also: from the picture, it looks like the wafer is down at the bottom of the cup of grape juice.  Wouldn't that make it a yucky-gooey mess by the time you're supposed to "eat" it and think of Jesus?
"The question of whether atheists are, you know, right, typically gets sidestepped in favor of what is apparently the much more compelling question of whether atheists are jerks."

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Offline Bereft_of_Faith

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Re: A new flavor of Lunchables!
« Reply #4 on: September 09, 2014, 11:59:22 PM »
"Uses Christian Bread not a cut-down Catholic Wafer"

To reiterate:  It uses CHRISTIAN bread, not a cut-down CATHOLIC wafer!!!  ...so there's no chance of being transubstantiated into a papist.  Thank the Lord!

Offline natlegend

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Re: A new flavor of Lunchables!
« Reply #5 on: September 10, 2014, 12:43:14 AM »
Oh hell no, this is just so wrong
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.