Author Topic: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...  (Read 787 times)

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Offline Brad the Bold

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A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« on: January 31, 2014, 04:41:49 PM »
...a solider who leaves an injured comrade on the battlefield.

At least according to BYU - Idaho.



Ha Ha! Whaaaaat?  :o

So here's what I took away from this PSA (porn service announcement).

  • Porn is bad, violent war analogies are awesome!
  • Contrary to what you might think, BYU dudes addicted to porn always wear pants.
  • At BYU, guys watching porn leave their doors open, wide.
  • During a war, the enemy  will "whisper" to you, so you leave your wounded friends behind. Instead of, you know, shooting you both.
  • Jesus heals horniness.
  • When the roommate you "saved from the war" later stares achingly at you while violins swell, it's not erotic at all.
  • Nope, not even a little...
« Last Edit: January 31, 2014, 05:39:33 PM by Brad the Bold »

Offline neopagan

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Re: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« Reply #1 on: January 31, 2014, 05:29:01 PM »
Always a good idea to compare the evils of 21st century technology (internet porn on a Mac) with WWII soldiers fighting it out in the woods...

The next installment will feature the evils of rap music juxtaposed with the 17th century contoversy over non-scriptural words in hymns.
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Offline kcrady

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Re: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« Reply #2 on: January 31, 2014, 07:57:13 PM »
ROTFL!  Starting @2:52: "Huh.  I just caught my roommate with his johnson in his hand.  I know!  I'll send him off into a private room with a clergyman!"  CUT TO: "Now we're hanging out with REAL CHICKS!  I just can't tell if my roommate is supposed to start shagging them, or me."
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Offline ParkingPlaces

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Re: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« Reply #3 on: January 31, 2014, 08:06:52 PM »
Gotta hand it to them…

I guess it means that if you find your roomie injured, you need to give him mouth to mouth or something.
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Offline Nam

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Re: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« Reply #4 on: January 31, 2014, 08:19:15 PM »
Gotta hand it to them…

I guess it means that if you find your roomie injured, you need to give him mouth to mouth or something.

Talk about being oral...

-Nam
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Offline Nam

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Re: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« Reply #5 on: January 31, 2014, 08:43:55 PM »
So, are they stuck in WWII, or something? The war on masturbation and porn seems so horrible.

-Nam
A god is like a rock: it does absolutely nothing until someone or something forces it to do something. The only capability the rock has is doing nothing until another force compels it physically to move.

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously - Humphrey

Offline screwtape

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Re: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« Reply #6 on: February 01, 2014, 08:17:20 AM »
...a solider who leaves an injured comrade on the battlefield.

huh.  "They knew he was watching porn and they did nothing."  Those heartless bastards.  How could they just leave him hanging like that? 

Aside from the whole premise being completely absurd, I thought the implication was they should have helped out their roommate by giving him a happy ending.  I'm pretty sure that's in the book of Moroni.
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Offline Hatter23

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An Omnipowerful God needed to sacrifice himself to himself (but only for a long weekend) in order to avert his own wrath against his own creations who he made in a manner knowing that they weren't going to live up to his standards.

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Offline Graybeard

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Re: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« Reply #8 on: February 01, 2014, 11:18:15 AM »
Well, whatever you say, this approach seems to be working, Utah is well down the list of length of time on porn sites: http://animalnewyork.com/2013/us-map-of-top-porn-search-terms-is-revealing-a-little-bit/

Of course, it could always be that the citizens of Utah require less time to achieve what they wanted...
Nobody says “There are many things that we thought were natural processes, but now know that a god did them.”

Offline G-Roll

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Re: Don't leave the wounded on the battlefield
« Reply #9 on: February 01, 2014, 11:36:09 AM »
I actually prefer an evening of masturbation over an evening of fighting. But maybe I am weird. I dunno.

That’s a great video though!  ;D

Offline Nam

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Re: A friend who lets his roommate rub one out to porn is like...
« Reply #10 on: February 01, 2014, 01:02:07 PM »
...a solider who leaves an injured comrade on the battlefield.

huh.  "They knew he was watching porn and they did nothing."  Those heartless bastards.  How could they just leave him hanging like that? 

Aside from the whole premise being completely absurd, I thought the implication was they should have helped out their roommate by giving him a happy ending.  I'm pretty sure that's in the book of Moroni.

No no no...4th Nephi. Yeah.

;)

-Nam
A god is like a rock: it does absolutely nothing until someone or something forces it to do something. The only capability the rock has is doing nothing until another force compels it physically to move.

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously - Humphrey

Offline Nam

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Re: Don't leave the wounded on the battlefield
« Reply #11 on: February 01, 2014, 01:15:48 PM »
This is already posted in another topic.

-Nam
A god is like a rock: it does absolutely nothing until someone or something forces it to do something. The only capability the rock has is doing nothing until another force compels it physically to move.

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously - Humphrey

Offline Graybeard

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Nobody says “There are many things that we thought were natural processes, but now know that a god did them.”