Author Topic: Getting Through Chemo  (Read 3456 times)

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Offline wright

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #29 on: October 10, 2013, 11:26:15 PM »
^^^There are few theists that are or have been on this board I'd care to meet in real life. Junebug would definitely be one of them  ;).

Stay strong, june. Here's another poem that seemed appropriate.

Stories unbounded
 
Time and place: just rooms to fill,
honeycomb cells, memory distilled
into shapes and words by busy thought;
rushing by, in hivish circles caught.

And in the sorting, new junctions gleam;
connections spread, until it seems
that the latest is the oldest too,
forgetting the layers from which all grew.

So words and records clear one’s vision,
give events and places some precision.
But always, always bright memory fades,
details erode and close names evade.

Thus all past is fluid, in flux no less
than imagined futures. Dare to test
your stories against a witness who
may see them otherwise? Which is true?

So share the tales, your hallowed hoard:
risk all to laughter, let memory soar.
Rechecked, refined by others’ eyes;
burned away, all dross of pride.

Outward again, on replenished wings
let commingled thought smile and sing.
All time and place and life to share,
the splendid stories of earth and air.
Live a good life... If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. I am not afraid.
--Marcus Aurelius

Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #30 on: October 11, 2013, 03:47:37 AM »
Thanks that was lovely.
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #31 on: October 11, 2013, 09:19:36 AM »
Gavin Free once said.

Quote
Ohh, you have cancer, i got that, just stop...

Not helpful, but ehh.
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline Zankuu

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #32 on: October 11, 2013, 03:04:24 PM »
What does that quote mean? What is its significance to you? And if it isn't helpful then why post it? Some friendly advice: try to be more prudent and put more effort into your replies.
Leave nothing to chance. Overlook nothing. Combine contradictory observations. Allow yourself enough time. -Hippocrates of Cos

Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #33 on: October 11, 2013, 11:45:01 PM »
The point is that if you have cancer, fight it, stop thinking it is there.
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline wright

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #34 on: October 11, 2013, 11:56:39 PM »
^^^That really doesn't clarify what you mean. How does stopping thinking about one's cancer help fight it? junebug is fighting with every weapon she has, best I can tell.
Live a good life... If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. I am not afraid.
--Marcus Aurelius

Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #35 on: October 12, 2013, 12:01:43 AM »
Well if you go around saying "this cancer is going to kill me, and i have nothing i can do about it", you are not going to get very far, aren't you?
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline wright

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #36 on: October 12, 2013, 02:12:18 AM »
Well if you go around saying "this cancer is going to kill me, and i have nothing i can do about it", you are not going to get very far, aren't you?

Okay, thanks for the clarification. Can you see how "fight it" seems to contradict "stop thinking it is there"? And how the quote from Free might seem dismissive, as if saying someone talking about their cancer is annoying and should just shut up?
Live a good life... If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. I am not afraid.
--Marcus Aurelius

Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #37 on: October 12, 2013, 04:31:17 AM »
Gavin Free once said.

Quote
Ohh, you have cancer, i got that, just stop...

Not helpful, but ehh.

Thanks AA.  I think I know what you mean.  Trust me wishing it away doesn't help.  I'm halfway through the fight and feeling strong.  I'll call my tulpa ladybug and she will fight off all bad thoughts. ;)
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #38 on: October 12, 2013, 12:00:14 PM »
Thanks AA.  I think I know what you mean.

Good ;P.

Trust me wishing it away doesn't help.

So wishing that it would kill you would help instead?
I don't think so...

I'm halfway through the fight and feeling strong.

Good, i know too many people who have died from cancer already.

Comments moderated
GB
« Last Edit: October 13, 2013, 01:12:37 PM by Graybeard »
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #39 on: October 13, 2013, 04:36:39 AM »
Thanks AA.  I think I know what you mean.

Good ;P.

Trust me wishing it away doesn't help.

So wishing that it would kill you would help instead?
I don't think so...

I'm halfway through the fight and feeling strong.

Good, i know too many people who have died from cancer already.

I'll call my tulpa ladybug and she will fight off all bad thoughts. ;)

I am sensing sarcasm here, but i digress.
I would not advise making a tulpa...

I can make a tulpa if I want to.  This is my thread, my cancer, my fight, my prerogative.  I wasn't being sarcastic I was accepting you the way you are.
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #40 on: October 13, 2013, 05:46:53 AM »
I can make a tulpa if I want to.  This is my thread, my cancer, my fight, my prerogative.  I wasn't being sarcastic I was accepting you the way you are.

You are actually making one? O.o...okay.
Maybe make thread with me? ;P
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #41 on: October 13, 2013, 07:17:56 AM »
Tomorrow is the 11 year mark since my brother succumb to pancreatic cancer.  He never had a chance.  It broke my parents hearts but it also started a healing between them and I.  My brother's life and death was not in vain.

Gary Randall Gibson 2/17/70 thru 10/14/2002   RIP

Angus I wish your smite happy ass would just stay clear of here.  You do not lift my spirit or my hope.  You bring me down man. 
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #42 on: October 13, 2013, 07:26:13 AM »
Careless comments removed.

GB
« Last Edit: October 13, 2013, 01:07:01 PM by Graybeard »
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline Traveler

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #43 on: October 13, 2013, 08:03:16 AM »
This is a support thread, Angus. Arguments or negative comments or smites really are out of place here, and quite off topic. There are plenty of other places to confront JB. She started the thread ... its really up to her what its about. There's a time and place for bitter truths, and this is not it. This, as her title states, is a place for Junebug to get support while she goes through chemo. Chemo sucks. I've been through it and would not wish it on my worst enemy.

Please, regardless of your feelings about JB or her opinions, keep on topic here. If you don't wish to offer support, this is not the thread for you.

Thank you.
If we ever travel thousands of light years to a planet inhabited by intelligent life, let's just make patterns in their crops and leave.

Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #44 on: October 13, 2013, 08:16:20 AM »
Careless comments removed
« Last Edit: October 13, 2013, 01:08:04 PM by Graybeard »
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline LoriPinkAngel

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #45 on: October 13, 2013, 11:22:43 AM »
^^ What part of HER THREAD do you not understand?  Buzz off!!! >:(

We support you JB !  (((hugs)))  <3
It doesn't make sense to let go of something you've had for so long.  But it also doesn't make sense to hold on when there's actually nothing there.

Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #46 on: October 13, 2013, 12:10:35 PM »
Personal edit: I will no longer reply to this thread as ordered.
« Last Edit: October 13, 2013, 01:49:29 PM by Angus and Alexis »
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline wright

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #47 on: October 13, 2013, 02:04:05 PM »
Tomorrow is the 11 year mark since my brother succumb to pancreatic cancer.  He never had a chance.  It broke my parents hearts but it also started a healing between them and I.  My brother's life and death was not in vain.

Gary Randall Gibson 2/17/70 thru 10/14/2002   RIP

If you can take any kind of peace from such an event, then more power to you. Please honor his memory by living long, junebug.
Live a good life... If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. I am not afraid.
--Marcus Aurelius

Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #48 on: October 14, 2013, 04:57:49 AM »
Well I hardly remember last week.  I know Thursday I didn't know if I was going to make it.  I was so weak, body trembling, hot and cold chills.  I still say the worse side effect for me is what it's doing to my mouth.  I swish,swish,swish and it doesn't help much.  Food just makes me want to gag.

This week will be better but I can't help but wish that was my last treatment.  I'm going to be so so happy when that day comes mid December.  I'm looking at it as a present.

My son and family are coming over today.  Many smiles.  Wes will mow one last time and gather up some more wood for me while April helps out inside.  I will hold the baby and it's going to be a wonderful day.!!!

I can't help but feel somewhat neglected.  I know there are many friends and some family that love me.  My phone doesn't ring.  Nobody knocks on the door.  I'm lonely.  I know that's why I spend so much time on here.  I also get to talk about something that's important to me.  It's not trivial like how many treats the dog ate, etc..  It's stimulating conversation.  I have learned a lot from here.  I just wish I didn't make people so mad.   :P

I would like to get into proving the existence of God as a life's goal but I really do not know where to start.  Am I too old and worn out to start something new.  I get the most discouraged not knowing what lies ahead.  I need to start figuring it out.  I want to do something that means something.  Getting laid off broke my heart.  I put that job up there in the people I love category. :?  That's what made me so good at it.  I was better than the boss.  I think that's what got me in trouble.  That and they didn't know what to do with their lesbian.  I think they hired me for political correctness and to feel good about it.  I don't think they realized I had dreams; that I was human.  Sometimes I wish I had kept that to myself.  Hindsight is 20/20.

What next?  The question of the day. :o
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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Offline Traveler

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #49 on: October 14, 2013, 09:00:06 AM »
I hear that! "What next?" is a question I ask myself a lot!
If we ever travel thousands of light years to a planet inhabited by intelligent life, let's just make patterns in their crops and leave.

Offline wright

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #50 on: October 14, 2013, 01:32:20 PM »
What next?  The question of the day. :o

So glad that overall, things are looking up for you. I'm sorry you're lonely at times; I'm a very solitary person by nature, but even I need to and do socialize.

Right now you need to concentrate your resources on getting through treatment and recovering your health. But part of the answer to your question might be volunteer work, when you can spare the time and energy. I'm sure that's occurred to someone as empathic as you before. A thought for the future, perhaps.

Here's to holding your grandchild and unwrapping that present in December!
Live a good life... If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. I am not afraid.
--Marcus Aurelius

Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #51 on: October 15, 2013, 02:21:34 AM »
Wonderful visit with the family.  My grand son is amazing. :laugh:
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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Offline wright

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #52 on: October 15, 2013, 02:54:04 AM »
Wonderful visit with the family.  My grand son is amazing. :laugh:

Like I said before, holding him is an affirmation of life. I was just looking for an article from years back about how a hospital noted an improvement in elderly patients' recoveries when those patients did volunteer work in the maternity ward. Sorry, couldn't find a link; I'll try again later.

Sounds like you're doing pretty well, junebug. You have your supporters in RL and a few here; more importantly you have you on your side. You will see this through and walk out of the shadow, head high.
« Last Edit: October 15, 2013, 02:56:06 AM by wright »
Live a good life... If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. I am not afraid.
--Marcus Aurelius

Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #53 on: October 17, 2013, 05:43:14 AM »
wright,

Thank you so much for standing by me.  I too think beliefs should be put aside to support a fellow human being.  You're words are always inspiring and encouraging.  I appreciate you so much.

Spent Tuesday at the hospital with an inflamed pancreas and hives.  My pancreas feels better but these hives I believe are a side effect from the neulasta shot.  It helps keep my red blood cells developing.  I'm having some neuropathy from it.  It itches and burns especially my hands. 

Thanks again,
JB
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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Offline Traveler

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #54 on: October 17, 2013, 07:16:19 AM »
I'm so sorry to hear that.  :( Neuropathy is no fun ... I still have it in my toes. A lasting reminder of chemo. Hang in there!!!
If we ever travel thousands of light years to a planet inhabited by intelligent life, let's just make patterns in their crops and leave.

Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #55 on: October 17, 2013, 07:39:19 AM »
Thanks Traveler.  I'm medicated now and it's eased off a little and hopefully here soon I'll be asleep.
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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Offline Betelnut

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #56 on: October 17, 2013, 10:36:07 PM »
JB:  Last summer I was going through chemo so I know some of what you are going through.  It is really tough.  People don't really realize it until they go through it themselves.  I'm really sorry to hear about your past experiences and how that is now not exactly helping with the current medical treatments.  I still have my port and get it flushed monthly--a quick prick and it's over.  I hope that you will come to appreciate not having to get an IV every time!  I'd rather have a port than an IV!

The worst thing for me was the weakness.  I would have to push up on the floor just to get up from the toilet!  Sheesh! Second worse thing--terrible, terrible gas/GERD.  I felt like my stomach was seething with gas for 3-4 days in between the chemo treatments.

I asked the doctor if my weakness was made worse because I wasn't in too good of shape before the chemo (overweight, not exercising, etc.).  She said, nah, even athletes get these side effects.  I don't know why but that made me feel better!  They are sending deadly chemicals through your system--of course it's going to affect you!

But...I am now cancer-free and feeling 98% recovered.  Still have neuropathy though in the toes, like Traveler said.

You are a strong lady--just keep waiting out the time.  It does get better if the treatments work...

Take care....


Offline junebug72

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Re: Getting Through Chemo
« Reply #57 on: October 18, 2013, 05:36:35 AM »
Thanks Betelnut I'll remember what you said.

Nam has finally managed to run me off.  I appreciate everyone here that has offered me support and encouragement.   But...


I'm done here too.  Apparently you must be crazy to seek support on an atheist website unless you're atheist.
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.
Thomas Paine

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