Author Topic: I'm bored...  (Read 272 times)

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Offline Nam

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I'm bored...
« on: August 25, 2013, 10:49:59 PM »
...so when I'm bored I do shit like this:

rivergreen

I could not hope more to breathe
 in each luminescent aura
where wind carries leaves beyond
 each silhouette of your form

It could be the happiness growing
 like the leaf to the root
or the touch of a lip upon a lip
 upon the single wave salted in
             rivergreen eyes
like tears wiped from the face
   gazing upon the autumn sun
gently slipping into the womb
   of the earth

I could not hope more to breathe
 in each whisper you echo in my heart
where the wind carries us beyond
 the silhouette of the moon



David Garrett Arnold
May 08 2013


:P

-Nam[1]
 1. Nam! why can't you ACT more like what you write? You ol' softy!
This is my signature "Nam", don't I have nice typing skills?

Offline ParkingPlaces

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Re: I'm bored...
« Reply #1 on: August 26, 2013, 12:00:13 AM »
Well, if you're gonna have a split personality, make sure one of them is sweet.  ;)

Very nice. Even the world "rivergreen" is, by itself, very poetic.

As  they say, I'm no judge of art, but I know what I like. I do hope that you're prepared for our lady friends who will undoubtably swoon. I'd swoon too but first I gotta google it.
Not everyone is entitled to their opinion. They're all entitled to mine though.

Offline Nam

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Re: I'm bored...
« Reply #2 on: August 26, 2013, 02:56:12 AM »
Well, if you're gonna have a split personality, make sure one of them is sweet.  ;)

Very nice. Even the world "rivergreen" is, by itself, very poetic.

As  they say, I'm no judge of art, but I know what I like. I do hope that you're prepared for our lady friends who will undoubtably swoon. I'd swoon too but first I gotta google it.

This ain't my "swoon" poetry, I can post one of those, though.

;)

-Nam
This is my signature "Nam", don't I have nice typing skills?

Offline wright

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Re: I'm bored...
« Reply #3 on: August 26, 2013, 03:19:58 AM »
This ain't my "swoon" poetry, I can post one of those, though.

;)

-Nam

Please do. It's interesting to see a less curmudgeonly side of you. I aspire to be a better poet, and that sample has strength and color. How long have you been writing poetry?
Live a good life... If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. I am not afraid.
--Marcus Aurelius

Offline Nam

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Re: I'm bored...
« Reply #4 on: August 26, 2013, 11:18:18 AM »
This ain't my "swoon" poetry, I can post one of those, though.

;)

-Nam

Please do. It's interesting to see a less curmudgeonly side of you. I aspire to be a better poet, and that sample has strength and color. How long have you been writing poetry?

22 years.

-Nam
This is my signature "Nam", don't I have nice typing skills?

Offline Nam

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Re: I'm bored...
« Reply #5 on: August 26, 2013, 11:54:12 AM »
Here ya go wright, this is "swooner" based on the comments from women over the years that love many of the lines in it, and as a whole.

Though sad, in a way, sad poems about love can swoon most of all over something happy. Women are weird. ;)

Arabella

Hear the age in me, the prophetic voice
Of one too scant of time to utter all.

              Alice Brown (The Immortal Witnesses, 1893)




there's music in the background
violins quietly rendering speech
  touching every thought
that's emanating within the aura
of breath

regret seems languished
salivated beneath the sun
awoken to the sea's cry

I had written an effigy
  in a tattered book
covered in dust that
  sat in the tomb
of my heart
              felt you
between the pages within
each tear that you cried

it was more than just the touch
more than the look of elegance
  that I once felt
vibrating through your bosom
  I could feel more than your eyes
on my heart loving me as I loved
  you


the moon disappeared beyond the field
each tear seemed a definition of
  something that didn't feel real

I can still see you standing
atop the hill that carried you away
estranged from pure happiness
  that existed in the boundary
of us

I wept in the evening
  lethargic anecdote of self-doubt
compulsory reflection of anguish

"I have loved and lost..."

I feel as if I am without
  the soul you gave me
from the gentle kiss
  succulent and tame
consumed within my eyes

"I had lost my love..."

certainty of time held in one moment
  an eternity till the last breath






David Garrett Arnold
September 15 2007
This is my signature "Nam", don't I have nice typing skills?

Offline neopagan

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Re: I'm bored...
« Reply #6 on: August 26, 2013, 12:02:13 PM »
Damn, Nam... here I thought you had a heart two sizes too small and you start waxing all Poe-etic.

Nice work
If xian hell really exists, the stench of the burning billions of us should be a constant, putrid reminder to the handful of heavenward xians how loving your god is.  - neopagan

Offline wright

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Re: I'm bored...
« Reply #7 on: August 26, 2013, 12:20:03 PM »


Arabella

Hear the age in me, the prophetic voice
Of one too scant of time to utter all.

              Alice Brown (The Immortal Witnesses, 1893)




there's music in the background
violins quietly rendering speech
  touching every thought
that's emanating within the aura
of breath

regret seems languished
salivated beneath the sun
awoken to the sea's cry

I had written an effigy
  in a tattered book
covered in dust that
  sat in the tomb
of my heart
              felt you
between the pages within
each tear that you cried

it was more than just the touch
more than the look of elegance
  that I once felt
vibrating through your bosom
  I could feel more than your eyes
on my heart loving me as I loved
  you


the moon disappeared beyond the field
each tear seemed a definition of
  something that didn't feel real

I can still see you standing
atop the hill that carried you away
estranged from pure happiness
  that existed in the boundary
of us

I wept in the evening
  lethargic anecdote of self-doubt
compulsory reflection of anguish

"I have loved and lost..."

I feel as if I am without
  the soul you gave me
from the gentle kiss
  succulent and tame
consumed within my eyes

"I had lost my love..."

certainty of time held in one moment
  an eternity till the last breath






David Garrett Arnold
September 15 2007


Thanks, Nam. The flow of that one seems less consistent than the first one you posted, but it still has power. There are lines in both of them that I wish I'd come up with.

22 years.

-Nam

I've been at it for a bit longer. Anything published anywhere? That's something I aspire to; I've made the final cut in a couple of local poetry contests, and am part of a local poets group that give each other feedback and support.
Live a good life... If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones. I am not afraid.
--Marcus Aurelius

Offline Nam

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Re: I'm bored...
« Reply #8 on: August 26, 2013, 03:44:22 PM »
wright,

Published many places, but since I don't keep records of them, I couldn't tell you. I have a page at http://allpoetry.com/Nam -- over 1,000 poems (most of them suck) but you have to be a member (free) to read any of them. I keep trying to take "no guest" away but it keeps putting it back. I've told admin there, they don't care.

-Nam
This is my signature "Nam", don't I have nice typing skills?