Long time no see. As you might have known, I came here formally a christian with ridiculous threads. Just to keep the past short, I came here to attempt and understand an atheist's perspective on life (if not, I don't know why I came here). Now well, I'll go on explaining on the things I've learned throughout the years. I've been on a 3 year or so hiatus, and learned many things. You can certainly say, this forum was one of the things that started my journey on learning philosophy, God, and all sorts of garbage I found on the internet.
Although there is harm in believing in Christianity, Catholicism, or any sort of organized religion. Sincerely because it limits your mind, creating a core belief that you subconsciously follow. And whatever that opposes it, will bring in unhappy results, but it's different for everybody. The perspectives of life is vast, and is nice in variety.
In a person that dedicated their life to a supernatural entity's perspective, you can say it's quite a beautiful experience on the first few days or so. Maybe not for everyone, but these types of people feel like their special. It's their motivational drive, you can say. Although that type's mind is narrowed, and doesn't think in a formal way (generally), he/she will avoid any contradictions that comes into his/her way, in order to live in their own little paradise.
You can say that's blind, stupid, and ridiculous. But I find it of a beautiful thing, especially when groups form and they cheer and celebrate how powerful and beautiful their God is. I was once that type of man/female/plant, though I wasn't certainly the one to join in parties and celebrate that sort of stuff. I've looked more into the paranormal, supernatural, and spiritual sides of the internet. Most of them are interesting, claiming all of these sorts of things that no science can ever prove. Truly, how can we know anything?
To put it more into detail, if a 3 year old claims he can talk to spirits, we praise the boy for his imagination and hope to Darwin he doesn't do that same thing 20 years later. If a priest does it, it's just plain ridiculous we'd just ignore it. But how would we truly know about these spirits? How can we know that our imagination is actually just an inbox full of messages from billions of spiritual entities from the astral plane? I can't, I'll admit. That's a question that we cannot ever answer, unless we go into the fields of astral planes (if it exists) and firmly prove its existence. Then maybe we might create a hypnosis that our imagination isn't as it may seem to be.
Aside from that nonsense, I've had a thought about the whole Hell thing. Truly, we live in ignorance. We won't ever know if we live in a complex dream, we won't ever know if we're just scripts running in a computer, or a brain that's getting sensations from a server. Even if that's absurd, what's even more is that the Matrix is probably real!
Now, once I die in ignorance, not having a single clue what's coming to me; and I see the theistic God, what would I do? What would you think I do? Bash him because of the lack of clarity and information he gave me and let out into the world? What about our climate change, economic, and poverty problem? I can go on and on about the fear and misinformation he allowed into the world. He's at fault for all this; and if I had a sword made by 666 angels, a demon lord by my side, demonic techniques, and 4 elemental spirits inside me like that eroge visual novel I played, then I would attempt to defeat him and change his ways!! (or at least try)
As ridiculous as that sounds, what happens if I don't have all that special stuff? I would simply question him, and neither go to Heaven or Hell, but ask permission to have the freedom of exploring and wandering around the void of reality and beyond. But above all that, I don't think that a Hell exists, but made merely for the fear of obtaining believers and spreading their word. I no longer believe in the Bible, because it was completely prone to corruption, modification, and mistranslation. I don't really view it as an ancient text anymore, but I believe there's a bigger story than its proneness.
As reality's time goes, I believe I changed. Something good; certainly not in the Christian's paradise I once was (until I started questioning everything), but something that sparked an adventure of mysteries and the boundaries of reality itself. I view the Christian's life as a peaceful time to live in, something to hope for. Destroying that hope makes that person to rely on himself/herself, science, and most often history. That's most often a good thing, because that sparks the mind and leaves it open for many things to come. Everybody has something that they rely on, or at least center their world at. The things they center can change as frequently as that person does, it's more of a subconscious thing. That's something I view, whether it's right or wrong for you.
Out of all, and in conclusion, I've come and gone by the mass's ways. I'm still learning, but you may not think of me as an atheist, nor Christian. You can refer to me as agnostic, or weak atheism. And if the spiritual realm truly exists as they say (or at least an extremely interesting dreamland), then I wish to dive deeper into it, as much as possible (hoping to not get my rep ruined by evil rock golems in the way). But why did I dive into the spiritual field filled with blasphemy and lies with little truth? Because honestly, how would we know anything? In simpler form to explain it, what if we live in a dream? What if we have the ability to level up our consciousness into a more powerful level? Absurd and stupid as it sounds, that's the basis of it. Without judging it though, it does interesting. You can say I feel more at home in the Spirit Science or some other similar forum, which I do feel that way. But exploring other things don't hurt as much as believing in things, don't they?
I've learned so far, the basic conclusion of it, is that the only thing I truly know is that I exist and I know nothing.
Hopefully I made my point in this very, very long post... I'm not very well in keeping things clear, or things on topic, but I hope that this read gives you a good insight of what's going on in me so far. Also, I'm aware that I didn't cover absolutely everything here (entire stories never lurk in one source).
Have a nice day~
P.S: Move this thread anywhere you see fit, I didn't exactly cover only "testimonials" here.