Author Topic: Humor  (Read 1804 times)

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Offline Tero

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Re: Humor
« Reply #29 on: December 07, 2013, 07:21:16 AM »
manager class, the involved manger
"It is important to speak to your direct reports"
"write down in the notebook when you last spoke to them"



One of mine:
http://karireport.blogspot.com/2013/12/god-driving-poorly.html
« Last Edit: December 07, 2013, 07:30:30 AM by Tero »

Offline MadBunny

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Re: Humor
« Reply #30 on: December 14, 2013, 06:44:33 PM »
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?

Sneakers.
Give a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a night.  Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Offline Tero

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Re: Humor
« Reply #31 on: December 16, 2013, 10:43:48 PM »

Offline magicmiles

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Re: Humor
« Reply #32 on: December 16, 2013, 11:07:36 PM »
On the weekend we had relatives over. My 5 year old niece was having fun, running up and hitting me when i wasn't looking and running away giggling. So I said to her "Whatever you do, don't hit me on this shoulder" (pointing to my left shoulder. I happen to have a whopping ugly scar there from surgery years ago. So of course, my niece runs up and hits me in the shoulder and runs away giggling. I lift my shirt sleeve, moaning and groaning and show her my scar. I've never seen somebody's face change so quickly. Poor thing really thought she had wounded me badly.  I had to quickly re-assure her.

It was pretty funny.
The 2010 world cup was ruined for me by that slippery bastard Paul.

Offline MadBunny

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Re: Humor
« Reply #33 on: December 17, 2013, 09:07:15 PM »
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

No chickens yet.
Give a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a night.  Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Offline Angus and Alexis

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Re: Humor
« Reply #34 on: December 18, 2013, 08:24:42 AM »
Must...refrain...from posting....ponies...
*clicks copy/paste*

(sorry if image is too large, i couldn't find a "spoiler" tab to hide it)
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline Tero

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Re: Humor
« Reply #35 on: December 18, 2013, 10:29:51 PM »

Offline magicmiles

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Re: Humor
« Reply #36 on: December 19, 2013, 12:44:57 AM »
The 2010 world cup was ruined for me by that slippery bastard Paul.

Offline MadBunny

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Re: Humor
« Reply #37 on: December 19, 2013, 01:53:13 AM »



Somehow never gets old.
Give a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a night.  Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Offline Tero

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Re: Humor
« Reply #38 on: January 06, 2014, 05:42:45 PM »

Offline EV

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Re: Humor
« Reply #39 on: January 06, 2014, 07:45:28 PM »
...

Q: What's the opposite of Christopher Walken?

A: Christopher Reeves!

This brilliantly works on two levels- I read it as Christopher Walk-in and Christopher Leaves... Then realised it was a bit more serious than that!
Quote
"Although it is not true that all conservatives are stupid people, it is true that most stupid people are conservative."
- Philosopher John Stuart Mill, from a Parliamentary debate (May 31, 1866);

Offline Tero

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Re: Humor
« Reply #40 on: February 25, 2014, 07:34:15 AM »

Offline Hatter23

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Re: Humor
« Reply #41 on: February 25, 2014, 02:29:05 PM »
Why does God have a Beard?

He's afraid it might be an Occam's razor.
An Omnipowerful God needed to sacrifice himself to himself (but only for a long weekend) in order to avert his own wrath against his own creations who he made in a manner knowing that they weren't going to live up to his standards.

And you should feel guilty for this. Give me money.

Offline screwtape

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What's true is already so. Owning up to it does not make it worse.