if you could go into outer space...

[MatCauthon]

how would you feel if your significant other "wouldn't let you"?

I was watching Big Bang Theory tonight, and Howard found out he was included on a mission to go to the international space station. His gf completely flipped shit and caused a huge argument. After probing my wife about what she would do, she eventually confessed that she would do the same thing, because of the danger or some stupid thing. (BTW, I'm in the military! But... she doesn't like that either, even though I'm getting out in 3 years.)

What I don't understand is how significant others (empathetic women at that) can't be understanding about a "not in a lifetime opportunity" such as this. I say "not" instead of "once" for obvious reasons- if you somehow can't piece together that the odds of going into space is about 1 in 2 billion or more, you probably should be reading something else right now.

I literally could not live with myself if I had the chance and turned it down. I would rather die than live another day knowing what I denied myself because I could not deal with the regret. I honestly can't say that I've ever said that about anything else in my entire life. I love my wife. a lot. But not that much. It may sound horrible, but to me, outer space is bigger than relationships.

Thoughts?

[Dante]

I've actually had this conversation with my ex, long before BBT broached the subject. She coulrnt fathom how I could want to do such a thing, especially since she wouldnt be along for the ride.

That's one of the reasons she's an ex.

[none]

what does outer space offer?

[Bereft_of_Faith]

Both Howard's girl friend and his mother eventually came around. 

I suppose when one really cares for someone, their safety is a primary concern, but when even such a person realizes that the happiness and fulfillment is at issue for the person whom they wish to protect, they reconsider.

I hate that my daughter lives in a big city, and immediately took steps to dissuade her from moving there, but within a very short time, realized that her happiness was at stake, so I gave her my blessing.

[MatCauthon]

what does outer space offer?

what life on planet earth does not. considering the vastness of the universe, i'd say it would offer quite a bit. I could go into the numbers, but I think they would be lost on someone like you.

[Nam]

I think one has much more of a chance being in danger here than in the vastness of space.

-Nam

[none]

what does outer space offer?

what life on planet earth does not. considering the vastness of the universe, i'd say it would offer quite a bit. I could go into the numbers, but I think they would be lost on someone like you.

yeah best not go into the numbers with me.
lets stick to why you really want to go, shall we?

what life on planet earth does not.

like what, peace and quiet?

[pianodwarf]

how would you feel if your significant other "wouldn't let you"?

I don't have a significant other, so this is a non-issue for me.  Assuming that I did, however, I would understand how she felt and would probably refrain from going.  Space travel is extremely dangerous.  If you were a space shuttle astronaut, you had approximately one chance in seventy of being killed (and in a particularly horrible manner, too, not that there's really any good way to die).  Those are not good odds.  I wouldn't care about it if it were just me, but if I were involved with someone, I wouldn't want to have to subject her to that kind of fear, and if she wanted me to refrain, I would understand and do so.

[HAL]

what does outer space offer?

Exploration.

[Anfauglir]

.....if I were involved with someone, I wouldn't want to have to subject her to that kind of fear, and if she wanted me to refrain, I would understand and do so.

Where is the cut-off point though?  Sure, its probably the worst odds ever....but what if she didn't want you to ride a motorbike?  Go to the pub in the dark?  Use a mobile phone in case it gave you cancer?  (This isn't just at you, BTW, its a general point).  It could be the case that someone may not want us to do something because they are (quite honestly) afraid for us.  Should we always cede to their wishes?  Or only if we think their fears are baseless?  Or only if their fears are above a certain level of probablity?

[Dante]

what does outer space offer?

The opportunity to boldly go where no man has gone before.

[Quesi]

A one-way trip to Mars?  No.

A chance to spend a week or a month on the Space Station?  Absolutely. 

How many people die each Labor Day weekend on the highways en route to the beach?  Should you avoid this end of summer ritual because of the danger?  Should you stay home and take the risk that your hot water heater could explode, killing you and your loved ones? 

There are a lot of things that we do that involve risks that we don't even think about.  To pass up an opportunity like that because of fear?  Nope.

[Kimberly]

I wouldn't care about it if it were just me, but if I were involved with someone, I wouldn't want to have to subject her to that kind of fear, and if she wanted me to refrain, I would understand and do so.

I agree with you PD.

IMO once you enter in to a committed relationship the significant other has a right to express their opinion on life/death situations. You've basically entered in to a verbal agreement to coexist together. If you get married even more so. I personally am a selfish lover. I wouldn't want to lose my significant other to space travel. I try not to be suffocating but I'm honest about my intentions. If that person wants to break their agreement with me about our relationship then I have the right to break my end of the agreement as well. If he falls in love with space more than me than so be it. I'm not gonna stop him, but that doesn't mean I will sit around waiting for him to return or blow up. It doesn't mean I won't either, but I would have the right not to.

[Emily]

If I had the chance to go into outer space and my husband didn't want me to, I'd go anyways. Even if it does lead to the two of getting divorced I'm sure "Yeah, well, I went into outspace" would be a really, REALLY good pickup line. I probably wouldn't be single for too long. 

Going into space would be one hell of an achievement. I would hate to let the possibility slip away. Even if there are dangers involved, there is also a lot of successful missions.