Thank you for taking the time to respond MM. There is so much that you don't know, and so much that you don't like.
And yet you believe.
Are you positive you've never had the slightest hint of a truth resonance though? ( I asked this in the shelter once )
I responded to that post MM. I responded that I have "felt" that it was impossible for a loved one to really be dead. Years after their deaths, I still have imaginary conversations with them in my mind. I turn to the memory of my dad when I have an ethical dilemma. I turn to my mom when I have a really rough day. When I accomplish something that makes me proud, I imagine how they would respond. As I watch my beautiful daughter grow, I imagine that they are beaming with love and pride. I would LOVE to believe that they are "guardian angels" watching me, and helping me, as they did throughout so much of my life, and sharing my joy and shouldering some of my burdens.
But I don't.
In terms of Adam and Eva and Abraham and Jonah and Noah all of that? No never. But they are great stories (mostly myths) that create a fascinating portrait of an ancient time and a very foreign culture.
Do I think that the 10 Commandments are the 10 most important value systems? No. I like some of them. I think we could all benefit from not coveting. Valuing life is paramount. Holy Sabbath and no graven images? I could identify some much more universal moral imperatives. If there is such a thing.
Jesus? I like a lot of what he said. Other stuff, not so much. In terms of ancient philosophers and social activists, I like him. I really respect people who fight against foreign occupation, like he did some times.
Is he the GREATEST philosopher ever? Eh. But he is a fascinating and complex character, worthy of historical acknowledgement. Whether he was a real, living human being, or a myth himself, he is still fascinating.
Did his mother get pregnant by a celestial visitation and give birth as a virgin? Ummm. I think that is just silly.
Did he raise from the dead? I think (if he existed) his friends think he did. That is what I tell my daughter. That his friends loved him so much, and that they missed him so much when he died, that they thought he came back to life, and they even told stories about it. I can identify with so wanting someone you love to come back to life.
The trinity? Never made a damn bit of sense to me.
The practice of Christianity? My grandma used to hide little cards with pictures of saints on them all over he house. We found dozens after she died. She prayed. She believed. I suspect she had me secretly baptized, because my parents say she was really mad that they didn't baptize me, and then she just stopped talking about it. She was a good person who lived a good life, and I loved her and respected her.
My parents, (atheist dad, agnostic mom) let me go to Sunday school for a few months when I was about 8 and all of my friends were going. I begged. They acquiesced. It seemed forbidden and secret and really exciting. But the Noah's Ark story just seemed silly, and the other stories were kind of boring, and the art projects were not all that interesting.
So no. I never "felt" it.
I wrote in another thread "about having to pick a religion" about "feelings" I have about the connectedness of all things, and the wonder I feel about life and nature and humanity, and I blended in my value systems. What I wrote there is what really resonates with me.
So your god does not like my values? Maybe, I was destined to be left out of his plan at the beginning of time? Maybe I'm just really evil to the core?
I know your answer is that you don't know. But are any of the possible answers really acceptable to you?