« previous next »
Pages: [1]   Go Down

Author Topic: Got Away  (Read 319 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Nick

  • Professor
  • ********
  • Posts: 9451
  • Darwins +143/-4
  • Gender: Male
Got Away
« on: March 31, 2012, 03:55:14 PM »
Hey, I got home at noon today and there were 2 pamphlets rolled up in my front door handle.  Yes, JWs struck and I was gone.  Damn, I have waited so long to encounter some and the sneaky bastards got away.  I'm going to have to set a better trap for next time.

I guess they wanted to know if I knew Jesus.
Logged
Yo, put that in your pipe and smoke it.  Quit ragging on my Lord.

Tide goes in, tide goes out !!!

Offline caveat_imperator

  • Undergraduate
  • ***
  • Posts: 185
  • Darwins +5/-0
  • Gender: Male
Re: Got Away
« Reply #1 on: March 31, 2012, 05:34:57 PM »
Put some sticky traps out for them next time. ;D
Logged
You can't prove a negative of an existence postulate.

Offline Ambassador Pony

  • You keep what you kill.
  • Administrator
  • *******
  • Posts: 6789
  • Darwins +61/-4
  • Gender: Male
  • illuminatus
Re: Got Away
« Reply #2 on: March 31, 2012, 05:51:15 PM »
It's their Easter drive. They do it every year.
Logged
Quote from: jakec47 on March 14, 2012, 07:18:45 PM
You believe evolution and there is no evidence for that. Where is the fossil record of a half man half ape. I've only ever heard about it in reading.

Offline Whateverman

  • Reader
  • ******
  • Posts: 1351
  • Darwins +6/-5
  • Gender: Male
    • Skeptical Minds & Rational Thinkers
Re: Got Away
« Reply #3 on: March 31, 2012, 07:31:34 PM »
Quote from: Nick on March 31, 2012, 03:55:14 PM
Hey, I got home at noon today and there were 2 pamphlets rolled up in my front door handle.  Yes, JWs struck and I was gone.  Damn, I have waited so long to encounter some and the sneaky bastards got away.  I'm going to have to set a better trap for next time.

I guess they wanted to know if I knew Jesus.
I've found they tend to visit very frequently is they get a hint that you might be feeling depressed, or if your life aint going so well.  Toss a 6-pack of empties onto your front lawn, don't mow it for a month, and keep the shades lowered

They'll be back in no time...
Logged
- SMRT Admin
Compared to this thread, retarded midget wrestling for food stamps is the pinnacle of human morality.
-- Ambassador Pony

Offline Eddie Schultz

  • Undergraduate
  • ***
  • Posts: 148
  • Darwins +4/-0
Re: Got Away
« Reply #4 on: April 01, 2012, 04:58:51 PM »
I had a JW come to my door last year around this time. He had a 12 year old kid with him. So when I told them I was an Atheist, it shocked them noticeably.

The guy asked me why I didn't believe in "GOD", and I asked him "which one"?

I asked him for an email address so I can send him some literature to learn from rather than just believing what his holy book says. He told me he would read what I send him, and get back to me with his thoughts. Needless to say, he never replied to me.

BTW, I checked with Yahoo (which his email was connected) and he did give me the right email address, just chose not to reply.

Another BTW, I looked straight at the 12 year old and told him that knowledge is at his fingertips on a computer, or he can go to a library and seek the truth about ALL religions.

Thanks
Logged
+1/-0 karm for this message

Offline nogodsforme

  • Fellow
  • *******
  • Posts: 4059
  • Darwins +281/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • Jehovah's Witness Protection Program
Re: Got Away
« Reply #5 on: April 01, 2012, 06:25:16 PM »
Quote from: Ambassador Pony on March 31, 2012, 05:51:15 PM
It's their Easter drive. They do it every year.

We got the seasonal pamphlet, too. I was a JW and I have been to enough "Lord's Evening Meals" already, thank you. Boooooring.  &)
Logged
Extraordinary claims of the bible don't even have ordinary evidence.

Outside of a dog, a book is my favorite companion. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.

Offline Hatter23

  • Fellow
  • *******
  • Posts: 2676
  • Darwins +125/-4
  • Gender: Male
  • Agnostic AND Atheist. Get used to it.
Re: Got Away
« Reply #6 on: April 04, 2012, 09:23:04 AM »
Quote from: nogodsforme on April 01, 2012, 06:25:16 PM
Quote from: Ambassador Pony on March 31, 2012, 05:51:15 PM
It's their Easter drive. They do it every year.

We got the seasonal pamphlet, too. I was a JW and I have been to enough "Lord's Evening Meals" already, thank you. Boooooring.  &)

I got it too, but in Spanish.
Logged
Most theist/atheist arguments tend to boil down to this: Theists quote scriptures as if they were facts and atheists cite facts as if they were facts.

Offline Nick

  • Professor
  • ********
  • Posts: 9451
  • Darwins +143/-4
  • Gender: Male
Re: Got Away
« Reply #7 on: April 04, 2012, 10:14:23 AM »
That's odd. Everyone knows God prefers English.  Just like Jesus spoke.
Logged
Yo, put that in your pipe and smoke it.  Quit ragging on my Lord.

Tide goes in, tide goes out !!!

Offline inveni0

  • Postgraduate
  • *****
  • Posts: 556
  • Darwins +11/-1
    • iMAGINARY god
Re: Got Away
« Reply #8 on: April 04, 2012, 01:59:25 PM »
It's as pointless to try to talk sense into a JW as it is to talk nonsense to an atheist.
Logged
http://www.imaginarygod.com

My book designed to ease kids into healthy skepticism is available for pre-order. http://www.peterskeeter.com

Offline Historicity

  • Reader
  • ******
  • Posts: 2350
  • Darwins +80/-2
  • Gender: Male
  • (Rama, avatar of Vishnu)
Re: Got Away
« Reply #9 on: April 05, 2012, 06:02:22 PM »
I was working in a shop one day for a company and as always I left the door open for light and air.

2 young men approached in white shirts and ties.  I had no suspicion of what they were going to do because the probability was too high for suspicion.  As expected one of them said he was from the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints and did I know about the other gospel of Jesus?

I nodded politely to indicate that I did know and calmly said, "I'm an atheist." 

short pause.

"Well, then there's that," said the young man and they turned and left.
Logged

Offline Ice Monkey

  • Undergraduate
  • ***
  • Posts: 239
  • Darwins +5/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Fund schools. Tax pot.
Re: Got Away
« Reply #10 on: April 05, 2012, 07:15:58 PM »
Quote from: Nick on March 31, 2012, 03:55:14 PM
Hey, I got home at noon today and there were 2 pamphlets rolled up in my front door handle.  Yes, JWs struck and I was gone.  Damn, I have waited so long to encounter some and the sneaky bastards got away.  I'm going to have to set a better trap for next time.

I guess they wanted to know if I knew Jesus.

The chalk outline and the tattered Watchtower magazines I keep on my widewalk seems to have had an effect.

If you do answer the door to them, try one of these:
Open the door, looking rather frazzled.  "Have I asked Jesus into my heart?  Shit no, the place is a mess."
or
"Have I asked jesus into my heart?  We'll get to that but quickly, I need to know... do you have anything that will get goat blood out of carpeting?"
or
"I have my own religion already.  What is it?  Um, it's not legal in most municipalities, so I'd rather not discuss it with someone I just met.  You a cop?"
or, my old favorite (gotta do it with your eyes as widely open as you can make them)
"Hey! Hey!  Does anyone know where you are right this minute?  No?  Get in here!  I know stuff we can do to each other!"

But being rather lazy in my old age, if it's two males (works best with Mormons) I usually just turn to the inside of the house and shout "Honey, that... couple is here to discuss the flower arrangements!"  Turning back to the couple, smile wryly and say "Well look at you two.  You've already been at it thismorning.  I can tell.  I remember that look.  Can't wait until the Big Day, eh?"
Logged
Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion." -- Charlie Chaplin

Offline Chronos

  • Global Moderator
  • ******
  • Posts: 1588
  • Darwins +64/-3
  • Gender: Male
  • Born without religion
    • Marking Time
Re: Got Away
« Reply #11 on: April 05, 2012, 08:44:36 PM »
When you answer the door, tell them you work for the Red Cross and you are signing up people for a blood drive -- then ask them for their blood type.

Logged
@chronosft / 15 till 3 / Faith is nothing more than hope with a gambling addiction

Offline Ice Monkey

  • Undergraduate
  • ***
  • Posts: 239
  • Darwins +5/-0
  • Gender: Male
  • Fund schools. Tax pot.
Re: Got Away
« Reply #12 on: April 05, 2012, 11:43:24 PM »
Quote from: Chronos on April 05, 2012, 08:44:36 PM
When you answer the door, tell them you work for the Red Cross and you are signing up people for a blood drive -- then ask them for their blood type.
Ha!

Just thought of the irony of a JW vampire.
Logged
Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion." -- Charlie Chaplin
Pages: [1]   Go Up
« previous next »