Your first 6 days in HELL

[RaymondKHessel]

http://www.flairfordesign.com/hell.html

This is a pamphlet on the counter at my corner gas station. It's all red and firey with HELL written all scary-like, and a picture of the surface of freaking SUN.

I was actually going to type up the entirity of the pamphlet's contents so you guys could have the opportunity to be both amused and disturbed as I was, but a quick search let me find the exact text on-line. Sweet!

I love how these doofuses actually have the skinny on not only Satan's estate, but the schedule of torment.

It just boggles the mind that these fuckers think THIS is the way to draw people in and sell them on an "all-loving" god. Hillarious in SO many ways! 


Here's a little sample...

DAY 3
At least you think it's Day 3. It seems like it has already been forever. You've not been able to sleep.

You still can't believe you're here. Where are the friends you thought you would see? The knowledge that they would be here too had brought you some comfort in your lifetime. Where is the fun you thought you would have? It isn't at all like what you were led to believe.

You stumble upon a group of others. You pour out a litany of questions. As they open their mouths, no words come out ... only the sounds of weeping and wailing. Some in the group don't even try to respond. They gnash their teeth, as if in some invisible pain.

You wonder when this nightmare will end. You wonder why somebody can't make it stop ... and it's only Day 3.

LULZ

Seriously though, I'm not the only one who fucking *hates* the term "gnashing of teeth" and it's derivitives, am I? It's always seemed cartoonish to me. Yosemite Sam gnashes his teeth. Mostly though, it's just such a blatent piece of propaganda terminology. NOWHERE else do you hear that term except from Christians or ex-Christians who haven't managed to quite drop it from their vocabulary yet.

Oh, and I also find it quite comical, the mental image of someone mouthing words and hearing dubbed-in wailing and weeping and whatever... Like something from Kung Pow: Enter the Fist lol.

<mouth says "I will avenge my clan's undesired riotous dysfunction!">

<what comes out "WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH">



Anyway. Thoughts? Comments? Christians, if your space genie is so beautiful and pure and all good all the time and just the loveiest deity to ever wuv you big huggy bunches... How the hell do you justify it allowing some place like this to exist? If all things in the universe come from your god, then this too, came from your god. And since this place is eviler than the evilest evil, and it came from your god, how the hell do you trick yourself into believing that your god doesn't have some massive resoivoirs of evil in it?

Exactly how many times DO you have to smash yourself in the head with a hammer before you manage to convince yourself that everything is just peachy?

Anyway. Disgusting stuff. Christians are gross. 

edit: Forgot to mention... The gas station is owned and operated by... Well, I don't know if they're all Mid-Easters or East Indians or what... But I'm pretty damn sure none of them are Christian. Got names like Wadeed and Sikraf.  So how did those pamphlets get there? Do the guys that run the place know about it? I'm going to say something about it next time I'm in there. They all know me since I stop by every day for smokes and iced tea/chockida milks, so maybe I can convince them that it's... You know... Retarded n' stuff.

[jetson]

Wow.  I'm not surprised though.  Remember, this is the Satan side of the equation - you known the one Jesus will protect you from, if only you'll just believe!

No matter how you slice it, this idea of eternal hell and torture as the only other option is precisely why religion is the most vile and disgusting things humans have ever invented.

Edit to add:

I have often asked Christian friends, why can't God just leave you to die, without the eternal paradise, as a rotting corpse, and with nothing to look forward to?  Why add Hell into the mix?  And the answer is simple: it's the oldest trick in the book: fear.  Fear is a much stronger motivator.  If you truly fear something, you will go the extra mile to avoid it.

[ParkingPlaces]

Actual fear as a motivator (Hmmm, that thar bear is looking a tad hungry and it's headed this way) works fine for humans. Sadly, fake fears often work just as well. We humans apparently lack the innate ability to tell the difference between the real and the made-up, and we are able to react with just as much adrenaline and/or panic to both.

Having a weakness is one thing. Exploiting weakness in others is another. For a bunch of yahoos that spend most of their time bragging about how moral they are, crap like this says otherwise.

If the bible had such detail in it about hell, then I could at least see where they were coming from, believer-wise. But since virtually everything in the pamphlet is made up in more recent times by total a**holes, there is no excuse for distributing such garbage, via dead trees or the internet or audibly.

But just in case, I think I'll convert.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

[gonegolfing]

(This scenario is based upon verses found in Revelation 20:14,15; Luke 16:20-31; Mark 9:43; Matthew 22:11-13.)

This article is used by permission. D.E. Rabineau is pastor of Evangel Chapel (Assemblies of God) in Bridgewater, New Jersey. This article originally appeared in the PENTECOSTAL EVANGEL, MAY 4, 1997.

Pentecostal says it all  ......That's the fearmongering denomination that I came out of. This vile and disgusting bullshit doctrine is taught at an early age in this denominations sunday school classrooms. grrrrrr..

This is the main doctrine that has kept the religions of christianity and islam so alive.

[Aaron123]

Wonder how they know all that in such details.  It couldn't possibly be the product of someone's imagination, could it?   

As your eyes struggle to adjust to the dark, you become aware of a new sensation. The heat. It's right at the edge of unbearable. Hot, searing, intolerable heat. Your body craves water. You'd give anything for a drink, and you try unsuccessfully to push that desire out of your mind.

If the heat is that hot, wouldn't I have noticed it a lot sooner than "day 2"?   

[Ivellios]

Wonder how they know all that in such details.  It couldn't possibly be the product of someone's imagination, could it?   

As your eyes struggle to adjust to the dark, you become aware of a new sensation. The heat. It's right at the edge of unbearable. Hot, searing, intolerable heat. Your body craves water. You'd give anything for a drink, and you try unsuccessfully to push that desire out of your mind.

If the heat is that hot, wouldn't I have noticed it a lot sooner than "day 2"?   

I would think, being a lake of Fire, it wouldn't be that dark either. I thought it would be, "It's so bright and I cannot see anything, but these flames!" If it's that hot, the person who wrote this better never sit next to a fire to warm themselves. It would take them 2 days to notice the new sensation of heat.

[jetson]

If the heat is that hot, wouldn't I have noticed it a lot sooner than "day 2"?   

Indeed, it is easy to feel the heat from controlled flames at a Rock concert - even when you;re not in the front row!

[Historicity]

Thanx, I dig horror fantasy and vampires are just serial killers and not enough for me.  I hope I will not be disappointed.  I hope it'll be as good as Dunsany/Lovecraft and give me a real shiver.

CUL8R

The intensity of the darkness is only matched by the absence of any joyful sounds-no music, no laughter, no sounds of merriment

Ah, come on.  Bad writing.  Let's put in some jack hammer noises to jangle your spiritual nerves.  Or does this mean that all the Heavy Metal musicians have gone to Heaven?  How about some irony with a rock singer whose rock&roll sounded like screaming -- and now it is!   The plaintive wailings of a lounge singer celebrating seductive lust are now just plaintive wailings.

You've just spent your first 6 days in hell. Unfortunately, an unholy, unhappy eternity stretches out before you ... and all because you rejected Jesus. if only...

But wait. The fact you're reading this says you still have a chance.

Well, how can it be Hell if we're exempted from reading your tracts?


I see there's some wallpaper associated with this.  I like to have horror wallpapers on my desktop in October. 

...

Oh, boring.  And this is on a site that calls itself www.FlairForDesign.com.

[bgb]

You'd think that the story of hell would be retold using our knowledge.  Hell is a nuclear reactor.  Something like that.

[RaymondKHessel]

You'd think that the story of hell would be retold using our knowledge.  Hell is a nuclear reactor.  Something like that.

Seriously. I've had some absolutely *terrifying* acid trips back in the day. Just based off some of those, I could create a hell that makes the one from that pamphlet look like a trip to Disney World.

You'll never hear a devoted Christian come up with a really good hell. They're all pussified when it comes to imagining s**t. As soon as they'd get any halfway decent hellish ideas, they'd immediately feel overwhelmed with guilt and start repenting, all emotionally torn up that they "let The Evil One in!" to give them such horrible, terrible thoughts.

lol... They start hyperventilating, need to sit down... I've SEEN that s**t happen. The super Jesusly ones just freak right the f**k out if they think about "sin". Because, of course, apparently THINKING about it is the same as DOING it??? Retard logic if ever I've heard it!

Or they really do feel like the thought is an attack from Satan. It's funny as hell to me when I'm talking to a Super Christian and they make the sign of the cross whenever the subject matter of the conversation gets dicey lol.

A girl I knew way back when actually burst into tears because some PG rated movie (she refused to watch anything over PG, and she was 24 years old! )... Because some PG rated movie made her think of something terrible.

Oh yeah! I remember now, it was something that mentioned AIDS in like, ONE scene out of the whole movie, and it was very subtle and barely even a noticable part. Her sister told us a few days later that the mention of AIDS made the image of two sweaty naked gay dudes blowing each other pop into her head.

This was enough that she apparently felt the devil had put an unshakeable evil image in her, one that she'd never be able to forget about... I mean, it REALLY fucked her up. I never hung out with her again personally, so I don't know if she ever mentally recovered.   

Lmao... She might have been kind of loopy even without the religion, but holy crap. It certainly didn't help her in this case. Just a straight up brain disorder dude.

Anyway, lol... Yeah. That fragile little weirdo would probably explode into a thousand pieces if she got a good solid image of HELLOOGABOOGA WWGHA style. 

[ParkingPlaces]

Over the years I've ran into several christians who, though born again and proud of it, still fear that they haven't done everything exactly right to please god and that they are off to hell when they die.

The worst of both worlds, methinks.

Keeping people in hell for all of infinity would require an infinite amount of energy. That won't leave any energy for heaven. Somebody is in trouble...

[RaymondKHessel]

^^^^

Ugh. That's SO freaking sad. That's got to boil down to some kind of inferiority complex or something. Like "I'll never be good enough".

I kinda have a bit of that myself. Sux. 

But I don't think I'll be TORTURED for eternity. That's infinitely worse.

[velkyn]

You wonder when this nightmare will end. You wonder why somebody can't make it stop ... and it's only Day 3.[/i]
Exactly how many times DO you have to smash yourself in the head with a hammer before you manage to convince yourself that everything is just peachy?

well, you have Christians like "Joe Blow" who get their rocks off on their little violent fantasies.   They *love* this kind of stuff. It makes them feel special. 

[Nick]

I really don't think any of that is right.  It's more like that on day 4.

[MadBunny]

Christianity in a nutshell:


I've never understood the supposed connection between a loving parent and one that sends it's children to burn for eternity.

[12 Monkeys]

Is a day in hell like a day in heaven as well? A day in heaven could be 1000 years could be 10,000 years,theists can't nail it down and use it as an excuse to why Jesus has failed to return.

[MadBunny]

Is a day in hell like a day in heaven as well? A day in heaven could be 1000 years could be 10,000 years,theists can't nail it down and use it as an excuse to why Jesus has failed to return.

I figure that as long as time is subjective, as it apparently is then it doesn't matter where you wind up.
Considering that there is only one activity in each realm..
They'd both be exactly the same after a trillion years.

Ten trillion years...

Look at it this way, no matter how much you might like pizza, it's gonna get pretty tiresome after a thousand years of just pizza.

[Nick]

Yet they keep coming up with these "end of the world" dates.

[12 Monkeys]

Is a day in hell like a day in heaven as well? A day in heaven could be 1000 years could be 10,000 years,theists can't nail it down and use it as an excuse to why Jesus has failed to return.

I figure that as long as time is subjective, as it apparently is then it doesn't matter where you wind up.
Considering that there is only one activity in each realm..
They'd both be exactly the same after a trillion years.

Ten trillion years...

Look at it this way, no matter how much you might like pizza, it's gonna get pretty tiresome after a thousand years of just pizza.

is the pizza fresh in hell? the Christian reasonings as to why Jesus has failed to return in his early followers lifetimes is hilarious.

[jetson]

It may not be fresh, but it's hot!

[Frank]

This is the drawback to eternity. Eventually it's going to get boring, even for Satan. After all once you've tortured one sinner you've basically tortured them all.
I mean what do dieties do all day? To already know everything. To already know the outcome of everything. An eternity with nothing to learn, no surprises, everything the same day after boring day.
Satan wouldn't have to torture us. With an eternity of boredom to look forward to we would soon create our own hell. Unforunately for Satan and Yahweh they would have to suffer it with us since they have nowhere else to go.
 

[Josiah]

Anyway. Thoughts? Comments? Christians, if your space genie is so beautiful and pure and all good all the time and just the loveiest deity to ever wuv you big huggy bunches... How the hell do you justify it allowing some place like this to exist? If all things in the universe come from your god, then this too, came from your god. And since this place is eviler than the evilest evil, and it came from your god, how the hell do you trick yourself into believing that your god doesn't have some massive resoivoirs of evil in it?

If we are speaking of the God of the Bible, it clearly states why He created Hell in Matthew 25:41:  “Then He will also say to those on His left, ‘Depart from Me, accursed ones, into the eternal fire which has been prepared for the devil and his angels;' "  Those who choose to have no part of God go to Hell and then Hell itself is thrown into the lake of fire:  Then Death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. This is the second death, the lake of fire. Rev. 20:14.

The God of the Bible created Hell and the lake of fire for those who choose to rebel against Him. 

If the God of the Bible is real and He did create the entire universe and all that is within it, then is there any reason why He should not have total authority over all the things He created, to do with them as He sees fit?  Wouldn't that be within His sovereign right, since He created everything out of nothing?

Now, if He has sovereign authority over all things, then He can make the rules and laws and He can be the judge of those who are subject to the rules and laws.  If He decides that those who rebel against Him and His rules deserve punishment, then what gives you, me, or anyone else the moral authority to question God's morality?

[Ambassador Pony]

How does ownership function in the non-temporal medium external to the universe? How is authority a coherent concept in that situation?

 

[jetson]

If we are speaking of the God of the Bible, it clearly states why He created Hell in Matthew 25:41:  “Then He will also say to those on His left, ‘Depart from Me, accursed ones, into the eternal fire which has been prepared for the devil and his angels;' "  Those who choose to have no part of God go to Hell and then Hell itself is thrown into the lake of fire:  Then Death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. This is the second death, the lake of fire. Rev. 20:14.

The God of the Bible created Hell and the lake of fire for those who choose to rebel against Him. 

If the God of the Bible is real and He did create the entire universe and all that is within it, then is there any reason why He should not have total authority over all the things He created, to do with them as He sees fit?  Wouldn't that be within His sovereign right, since He created everything out of nothing?

Now, if He has sovereign authority over all things, then He can make the rules and laws and He can be the judge of those who are subject to the rules and laws.  If He decides that those who rebel against Him and His rules deserve punishment, then what gives you, me, or anyone else the moral authority to question God's morality?

What gives me the right?  I'll tell you what gives me the right.  I am an independent, critical thinking human being.  And unless God is willing to stand in front of me and tell me straight to my face that I deserve his Hell, then he can go fuck himself.  No God has any authority over me.  That would take some form of enslavement of my mind, which I will not allow.  And if this god is such an authority, and truly owns each of us independently, and can do with us what he pleases, then what the hell is he waiting for?

Dear God, if you are real, fuck you, and your pathetic jackass of a son, Jesus.  The both of you, and Satan as well, can threaten me using pathetic human priests and pastors, and religious wannabes for the rest of my life, but I will never submit to your horrific world of hellfire and torture, or anything remotely resembling your commandments and genocidal ways of the old days.  And so on, and so on...

See, I have authority over the mythological deity invented by bronze age goat herders.  It's not the other way around!

Whew, that felt good.

[Frank]

Now, if He has sovereign authority over all things, then He can make the rules and laws and He can be the judge of those who are subject to the rules and laws.  If He decides that those who rebel against Him and His rules deserve punishment, then what gives you, me, or anyone else the moral authority to question God's morality?

Parents create their children. Does that give parents the right to harm or kill their children if they disobey them? Since that is what you have reduced the human race to. Nothing more than chattel to be discarded because we didn't do as we were told. Especially harsh considering we didn't ask to be here in the first place.

[jetson]

Frank!  How dare you compare an actual God to a mere mortal parent!

[Josiah]

How does ownership function in the non-temporal medium external to the universe? How is authority a coherent concept in that situation?

What is it that you consider "the non-temporal medium external to the universe"? 

If the claims of the God of the Bible are true and He has always existed even though nothing else existed, and then He caused everything that we humans can be aware to exist from nothing, then would He would have authority/sovereignty/ownership by virtue of His bringing something into existence from nothing.  Further, He claims that the material universe is only existing because He wills it to exist.  Therefore, He claims to bring it into existence and controls its existence.  If indeed He did and does, then He owns it.

[Historicity]

If the God of the Bible is real and He did create the entire universe and all that is within it, then is there any reason why He should not have total authority over all the things He created, to do with them as He sees fit?  Wouldn't that be within His sovereign right, since He created everything out of nothing?

Well, you and I are partly in agreement.  You agree that He is a sadist. 

Now, if He has sovereign authority over all things, then He can make the rules and laws and He can be the judge of those who are subject to the rules and laws.  If He decides that those who rebel against Him and His rules deserve punishment, then what gives you, me, or anyone else the moral authority to question God's morality?

Okay, your principal is that might makes right.  Actually that the supreme moral authority has no morality but His whimsy.

Honor is only among peers.  Since He does not consider you a peer, He has no reason to keep any agreements with you.  As you admit, you have not moral authority to question God's "morality".

[Josiah]

Parents create their children. Does that give parents the right to harm or kill their children if they disobey them? Since that is what you have reduced the human race to. Nothing more than chattel to be discarded because we didn't do as we were told. Especially harsh considering we didn't ask to be here in the first place.

Parents don't create ex nihilo nor do they claim to.  God claims to.  Parents don't continue to "will" their children's existence nor do they claim to.  God claims to.  Parents are only stewards and guardians of children.  God claims to be the creator of children.

Is it morally wrong for God of the Bible to create an imperfect sentient being and then pass judgment on that being and consign it to everlasting torment?  That's the question, isn't it?

If the claims of the God of the Bible are true, on what basis can a mere human, a created one, pass moral judgment on Him?