It is still unclear to me what problem you have with a gay man marrying a woman and having sex with her. Since he is having sex with her, doesn't that make him straight according to your definition? So what if he has to think about Brad Pitt to do it with her-- what he thinks is not important. He is doing the deed hetero-style, which makes him a straight married man. Isn't that what you are saying? So what is the problem?
NG, you can't be serious with this can you? How would you feel if your significant other was fanticizing about or preferred being with any other person aside from yourself? Such a person would not be worthy of being the recipient of my loving touch.
TOT, you missed my point. I think we can agree that a gay man who marries a woman he is not attracted to for social reasons (money, safety, family) is maybe sort of a jerk and a coward and a liar, certainly undeserving of the devotion the wife has for him. But my question for you is this: is he a gay
jerk, coward and liar?
Suppose he uses the money he gets from his wife to take care of his male lover, who he only gets to see once a month. He really loves the guy, has amazing sex with him and would do anything for him. Even sacrifice his body to a woman he does not find attractive. When he has sex with his wife he only thinks of his boyfriend. In what reality is this guy anything but gay?
Calling him bisexual is saying that his phony relationship with his wife is equivalent to his real relationship with his boyfriend. He is only pretending when he is with the wife. He is playing the role of a straight guy, like one of those actors who plays a doctor on tv. He spends most of his time pretending to do surgery, but he still ain't a doctor!
(Aren't there a lot of historical romances like this with servant or slave women playing the "he has my body but not my soul" part?)
If you pretend to be straight, does that make you straight? That would be interesting news to all the gay people who have vainly tried to stop being gay by dating the opposite sex. "You are gay because you just haven't met the right woman/man yet. You haven't had sex the way I cook it!" Ignorant men have tried this line on lesbians for about forever.
Does a straight porn actor who does mainly gay porn "turn gay" after a certain number of films, even if his romantic relationships off the set are with women?