What TOT is doing is little different, in principle, from redefining "male" according to stereotypical masculine behaviours, and "female" according to stereotypical feminine behaviours, so that a tomboy is termed "male", while a 'pansy' sort of guy becomes "female". This makes far more sense, according to TOT's reasoning, because behaviour is more important than one's own state.
The one difference is that TOT's proposition involves neglecting peoples' mental states, while my comparison involves neglecting their physical states. Both are neglected in favor of behaviour. Both are definite states, albeit with different degrees of evidence available to identify them.