Oddly, african americans use the N word among themselves but woe to the white guy who dares say it.
Only if they're saying it, especially to a black person, in a derogatory sense. I've said "nigger" to black people but that was them allowing me to say it to them. They explicitly told me I could. Though, when I did it at this one job I had a long time ago I found that a new guy didn't really care for it, so, I learned from him not to say it unless all of them agree it's okay for me to say it; so when I had another job years later, where 99.9% of those I worked with were black (including supervisors and managers), I didn't say it and some of my work friends asked why not, and I told them that unless everyone thinks it's okay, I won't use it otherwise. Even if one person thought it was not okay, I didn't. But they didn't care, either way 'cause they knew I wasn't 1. racist and 2. wasn't going to ever use it in a derogatory manner.
One job I had in the 90's, I got into a fight with a black friend of mine at work, who was my partner on the line we worked, and it was a stupid fight about something really stupid, won't mention what but at one point I was winning the fight (which was weird 'cause he was twice my muscular size) and we just stared into each other's eyes at one point, and he said, "You want to call me a nigger, don't you?" I told him that if I wanted to call him that, I would have, without hesitation but I didn't. It's not in me to do so, in a derogatory manner. We were eventually separated by our supervisor, put on different lines, and I stopped speaking to him (he did start the pathetic fight). 2 weeks went by, and he did something he told me he never did in his entire life up to that point: he apologized to a white person. I usually am not a forgiving person but I forgave him because I saw how tough it was for him to even attempt to apologize to me based on the fact I'm white, and southern. Then we went back on the line together, and we were friends for quite some time.
The nearest thing I stated to him that could be considered to be racist, but in total jest on my part, and he was okay with, was that he was saying shit to me, trying to goad me, see what I'd do, and I replied, 'At least I'm not named after a cracker
." His last name is Graham. Everyone stopped in the section, and he looked at me straight in the eyes, and then proceeded to laugh his ass off. Everyone laughed afterwards but not before, except a few other black guys. It was funny.