^^^My husband is out of town this week--wanna come out of the closet?
Only thing is, you'd have to walk the two dogs, deal with the mouthy teen daughter and help care for the elderly MIL-- in addition to your regular shoe classification duties. As I recall, the original agreement had you wearing a frilly French maid outfit. It is starting to look a bit shabby. And you need a back waxing.
The dogs I can handle.
The teen daughter... Is boarding school an option? Or one of those doggie electro-shock collars? I'm not really great with kids...
As for the elderly MIL... Is a nursing home an option? Or one of those Life-Alert collars? I'm not really great with geriatrics either...
Now that I think about it, I'm pretty much completely unqualified to be responsible for another person's well-being at all, aside from, I dunno, getting somebody a glass of water or making them a hot pocket or stopping them from putting weird foreign objects in their mouth, eye, or ear.
This simply demonstrates yet another way in which my meager and pathetic self pales in the brilliance of your magnificience my queen. I am but a flashlight pointed at the sun.
Since the reboot I haven't been able to get my little black puppy dog to show up. I downloaded that pic from cuteoverload.com and fed it and walked it and everything. Maybe it became a Christian or Zoroastrian doggie download and split for a more hospitable website. Oh, well. Easy come, easy go. There's more and cuter pix where that came from.
LMAO... Wait... So are you telling me that the cute ass little dog from your avatar is actually some generic K-Mart family photo dog that comes in wallets or something???
Dude that is so fucked up. All this time I related that little guy to you thinking it was your beloved family pooch, and now I find out it's all a lie!?
My entire world has been flipped upside down. I don't even know who I am as a person anymore. I need to go lie down.