Oh, this is great. The Flood is my absolute FAVORITE story in the bible.
I'll hold off on my usual bullet-points of retardatry and the 1001 plot-holes, and just pose this one question... It's a new one that just came to me about 10 minutes ago.
So forgetting ALLLLLL the logistical, physical, logical, etc. problems with the Flood, let's jump ahead to the part where Mt. Everest is covered in water.
As has been discussed previously, we're talking a world-wide rise in sea-level of 5.5 *MILES*. K? Who knows where it came from, or where it went, let's just say it was magical space water from the 5th dimension. Right.
Now, obviously Noah & his kin are going to be floating around on TOP of the water rather than underneath it.
So here's the problem. All that water is compressing world-wide air pressure to unsurvivable levels. The air is trapped and then insanely condensced between the stratosphere (is it the stratosphere I'm thinking of?) and this new 5.5 MILES taller sea level... Am I wrong, or would this not flatten Noah & his little wooden boat into splinters?
Assuming of course that they somehow managed to get around the fact that they're FLOATING AT THE HEIGHT OF MT. EVEREST... Did they have the foresight to pack life-saving oxygen tanks for Noah and family? Did they have giant ones for the elephants and little baby ones for the 22,000 species of flies?
Because it's very, VERY easy to straight up die at the top of Mt. Everest for lack of oxygen. And cold. That applies to humans... I'd imagine moreso for things that require more oxygen, like big ol' Hippo lungs. And how did all the cold blooded critters survive the -20' temperatures?
What drives me nuts is that when you have an all-powerful character at the heart of the story, the believer can hand-wave away ANYTHING. Not enough space for 9 million species? God made pocket dimensions on the boat. What did they eat? God made it so none of the animals got hungry. Where did they get enough potable water? It was RAINING, DUH! Too cold? Yahweh's fiery lovins made them totally warm & toasty.
it goes on and on, so that by the time you patch the 300+ plotholes and rifts in the story, the whole thing was a MASSIVELY overcomplicated exercise in ultimate futility (considering the world ended up "shitty" again later on down the road).
ALL this crap Yahweh would have had to do to make this story actually work, and you have to ask yourself, Why? WHY would Yahweh do all that? And why was *NONE* of it mentioned in the actual bible? Wouldn't Yahweh know these details would be important to future generations who would naturally be more skeptical due to their increased knowledge of things like physics and geology and biology and, er, boat making?
Wouldn't it have ADDED to Yahweh's glory to detail all the fantastic things he did to make this happen? Like Adamantium nails or cosmic water troughs or magically sating their hunger and poofing away the 1,000 metric tons of poop and 10s of thousands of gallons of urine being produced on the daily? Insulating the boat in a holy forcefield made out of Glory in order to stop the boat from being flooded and torn apart in the (what must have neccesarily been) hurricane force winds, repelling the various trees and buildings and billions of corpses that would have made the water a minefield for a wooden boat?
Why wouldn't those things be mentioned?
Could it be because the dumbasses who wrote the thing had virtually no imagination to ask these questions? This was long before Hollywood or the printing press; it's not like they had a whole lot of stories to inspire them. Well, actually, they did, but they were OTHER religious works, and they didn't so much use them for inspiration as they just flat out plagarized the s**t out of them and ripped them off.
But anyway, could it be the authors, for all their lack of imagination (and low opinion on their target audiences' capacity for critical thought), could it be they thought it sounded like a totally plausible idea just the way it was? Sure seems like it to me. <shrug>
I mean, why explain where all the animals go, there's only 1,000 species! And the boat is big! How big WAS this flood exactly? Oh, it, like, totally covered the tallest mountains. You betchya. What did they all eat? Shut up, next question. What? Sure the boat would hold together why don't you build one and prove us wrong oh yeah you CAN'T 'cos you're a broke ass illiterate bronze age pig farmer and god hates you. Now stop asking questions, this story is WATER TIGHT yo!
But after SO MANY apologetics and excuses and patches for this just really poorly thought out and badly told story... Why would your god go to all that trouble? And not only go through the motions of the 300+ magical "McBuffings", but make no mention of it so future generations will read the story and point and laugh at it's outright stupidity...
Why not just snap his fingers and "poof" away all the bad things?
Why the drama of the flood and all the magical protections and quantum space boats n' s**t? Again, we're talking like THREE HUNDRED or more magical miracles Yahweh would have had to poof-up in order to fortify the boat and it's cargo with the qualities and attributes they'd need to survive.
Why even have Noah build the ark in the first place if the actual vessel was irrelivent, since Yahweh would have had to put "pocket dimensions" in it anyway? Why did the size matter at all?
If you're going along THAT line of apologetics, wouldn't a floating box car of infinite holding have been just as effective? Or they all rode on a giant tree trunk or on the back of an enormous bird or something? How about the belly of a super huge fish?
Why not a giant floating palace? There ya go! MUCH better! Yahweh's Indestructable Floating Palace of Infinite Floor Space. Wouldn't that have made a nicer image? A great golden palace floating around, Yahweh's glorious golden light illuminating it in the pitch-blackness of the apocalyptic down-pour... The place where Yahweh's chosen survivors could lounge around and eat grapes and the kids could play with magically pacified lions n' stuff?
"Nah. Fuck that. You'll get a big ol' wooden boat and you can either accept it, or we can bludgeon you to death with big fucking rocks for being a heretic."
Oh. Well, you put it THAT way. Sure. Big ol' wooden boat. No problem. <thumbs up>
Blah. SUCH a stupid story. Just, really really bad. I've barely even warmed up here. I honestly just wanted to get that original question out about how they'd survive the increase in air pressure and the conditions at Mt. Everest heights.
And look what happened. I really oughta know better by now I guess.