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Offline Larissa238

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A bit about Larissa
« on: January 06, 2011, 09:19:25 PM »
A person on this site made a comment about my life, and rather than derail the thread we were in, I decided to post it here in Chatter.

God Dam Larissa238!!!!  I realize you are reletively new to this forum and I'm glad you're here, but we seem to learn something very, very deep and personal with you every other post!  I can't beleive you make up this stuff up but I'm almost surprised you haven't used turning to god as an excuse for your lifes many challeges.  Anyways, I didn't mean to go on a tangent but I'm glad you found this forum and feel comfortable in your own skin here!

I have no problem with who I am. I am many things, and I have lived a very hard life. I wish I was making some of this stuff up. I'm very very lucky to be as young as I am (I turn 28 next month) and to be at peace with myself. Many "normal" people I know are not at peace with themselves. I had a duality of existences growing up. My parents divorced when I was 2 and I have no memory of them ever living together. I lived with my Mexican father and stepmother from the age of 5-13 (my mom was declared unfit to take care of us when I was 5, so then my brother, sister and I moved in with my dad). On weekends I would stay with my white mom and stepdad. My dad lived in the ghetto and my mom lived in a nice suburb of Hollywood. In middle school during the week I would go to school in East LA, listen to rap music and had to stay inside to avoid drive-bys. Then on weekends it would be musicals, opera, movies and TV.

When I was 13 my dad killed himself. I understand why he did it. It doesn't make it right, it doesn't bring him back but since I understand why I have peace with it for the most part (aside from PTSD flashbacks). In some ways it was a relief since it got me away from my stepbrother. I still had plenty of bad things happen to me (like a violent stalker ex, thank Zeus he never hit me) and I have had a crazy, crazy life away from that.

I'm a minority in many ways. My blood sister and brother show a bit of the duality of our lives. Both my brother and sister have Mexican names and I have a "white" name. My blood sister fully identifies with being Mexican. She speaks fluent Spanish and is doing her Ph.D project on Mexican fathers. My brother on the other hand totally distances himself from his Mexican side and acts totally American. (yes, I know I'm making a generalization here. Please excuse it.) My brother goes by an Americanized version of his name at work and when I went to his work once, I called him by his (Mexican, real) name and not the Americanized version and people looked at me funny. They had no idea what his real name was. I'm a mix of my brother and sister. I speak decent Spanish and can go back and forth between acting American and Mexican. As you can see from my avatar, I look pretty much American and when I speak in Spanish sometimes I get funny looks.

I also have a myriad of mental illnesses, I consider myself a lesbian but I'm married to a man who I love (nobody understands that, I get it. I'm okay with that), and I'm an atheist.

As for the whole religion thing, I grew up as a "Christmas and Easter" Christian. Then in grades 9-11, I was a hypocritical fundie. In 12th grade I got involved in a cult. I stayed in the cult until my 3rd year (of 5) of college. I underwent many abuses in the cult, and had to recover from being brainwashed. Finally, my wonderful hubby got me to see the light and I deconverted.

I don't know how, but since I left the cult I have come to peace with myself. I call myself "crazy" sometimes, but that word doesn't have stigma for me. I don't mind all the weird things that I am (come on, how many people are self-proclaimed lesbians who are in a loving relationship with a man?) Some people get hopped up on labels. Everything has to fit into its place. I could care less most of the time. I'm also morbidly obese (5 foot 5 and 242 pounds- good thing is tho in the last 6 months I've lost 25 pounds) and female. I don't have body issues. I used to be anorexic/bulimic. I used to be a cutter. Now, I can walk around my apartment naked (sorry for the TMI) and look in the mirror and not obsess. I don't know many females who can do that. I'm okay with my body because it's the only one I have. Yes, I'm trying to lose weight, but my confidence doesn't change with the scale. I can see my self-inflicted scars and be okay with them. The only one I am not at peace with is the one on my wrist because people can see it and it takes too long to explain.

I remember times when I didn't feel this way. The first time I saw Donnie Darko a quote stuck in my head. Donnie says "I want to be an artist. Or maybe a writer. Maybe I can write a book and draw the pictures and then maybe people will understand me." (not word for word... my memory isn't too great. And yes, I'm okay with that too lol). I remember hearing that and totally understanding. Just to be understood... how great would that be? I saw the movie again a month or so ago and heard that line. I remarked how I had changed. I don't have this quest to be understood anymore. I don't know how, but it just comes with being at peace.

I swear, if I could figure out how I got this overwhelming sense of peace I could start a religion and make tons of money (only kinda kidding :P ). The thing is, it doesn't come from religion. I don't need a god to be at peace. You know all those people who turn to god to feel accepted? Somehow I got there on my own. And, damn, does it feel good.
On why Christians and non-Christians have the same rate of divorce:

He would rather it that they worship Him, instead of spending their time on family.

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #1 on: January 06, 2011, 11:11:52 PM »
Larissa, if you've been thrown that many curve balls and haven't struck out, you're doing something right.

The lesbian I fell in love with wouldn't marry me, so your husband must be pretty special.

Brains will get you out of all kinds of things that nothing else will. I'm guessing you've got some. Keep 'em. They'll be handy your whole life.

Glad you're here. You're contributing a lot to the forum and your candor is refreshing. I like that in a mixed race, mixed culture PTSD suffering ex-cult member lesbian atheist who can walk around the apartment naked and be comfortable.  :)

Jesus, the cracker flavored treat!

Offline DVZ3

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #2 on: January 06, 2011, 11:26:20 PM »
^^^ Ditto, and I couldn't have said it better myself! Thanks for sharing.
Hguols: "Its easier for me to believe that a God created everything...."

Offline Larissa238

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #3 on: January 07, 2011, 03:27:28 PM »
Larissa, if you've been thrown that many curve balls and haven't struck out, you're doing something right.

The lesbian I fell in love with wouldn't marry me, so your husband must be pretty special.

We met on a Stephen King forum and started talking on the phone. I was wrapped up in my horrible breakup with my ex (let me tell you, there's nothing like a lesbian-love triangle where all the people involved are mentally ill. The girl I was with fell in love with my ex, despite the fact that my ex wanted her dead... it's really messy) and I would talk to the future hubby for hours. He fell in love with me shortly after we met, thinking that it was absolutely hopeless because I think men are pretty icky, and somehow got under my skin. It helped that he was just a voice on the phone and me not seeing him physically. He proved to be trusting, loving, caring, and understanding- everything I was looking for. It was as hard as fuck to break down that wall in my mind and admit that I loved him. I felt like I was betraying myself. A man? Really? Eventually I came around. I still consider myself a lesbian because it's the closest word I have to what I feel. I love women, but made an exception for the hubby. I don't think he's icky, but think in general that men are still icky.

Quote
Brains will get you out of all kinds of things that nothing else will. I'm guessing you've got some. Keep 'em. They'll be handy your whole life.

Thanks. I'm very very lucky. You could say I'm a miracle in some senses. Despite the barrage of mental illnesses, I graduated from one of the top schools in the country (USC- Fight On!). In the clinic I used to get my therapy at, the doctors would use me as an example of what someone can accomplish despite facing impossible odds. I don't want to sound "prideful," but I am very smart. Things come very easy to me. I don't have to work very hard most of the time to pass classes (except physics and math- those subjects were mostly my downfall). I worked my ass off to get my Bachelors degree and literally almost paid my life for it. I'm very proud of it. I'm frustrated that in this part of my life I have to go on disability, but I need to get my disorders under control so I can continue my education.

Quote
Glad you're here. You're contributing a lot to the forum and your candor is refreshing. I like that in a mixed race, mixed culture PTSD suffering ex-cult member lesbian atheist who can walk around the apartment naked and be comfortable.  :)

Don't forget the rest of my disorders- some sort of bipolar/schizoaffective/possibly epileptic combination and Borderline Personality Disorder. And married-to-a-man-I-love lesbian. LOL! I love how I don't really fit into any category. There is only one word to describe me- Unique. And I'm proud to be everything I am.
On why Christians and non-Christians have the same rate of divorce:

He would rather it that they worship Him, instead of spending their time on family.

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #4 on: January 07, 2011, 06:01:42 PM »
Glad you're here. You're contributing a lot to the forum and your candor is refreshing. I like that in a mixed race, mixed culture PTSD suffering ex-cult member lesbian atheist who can walk around the apartment naked and be comfortable.  :)

Don't forget the rest of my disorders- some sort of bipolar/schizoaffective/possibly epileptic combination and Borderline Personality Disorder. And married-to-a-man-I-love lesbian. LOL! I love how I don't really fit into any category. There is only one word to describe me- Unique. And I'm proud to be everything I am.

I edited for the sake of brevity  :)

We're all unique, but you seem to be better at it than most. And your Borderline Personality Disorder beats the heck of of my ex, who had Missing Personality Disorder.

I always tell people we had a personality conflict. I had one. She didn't.
Jesus, the cracker flavored treat!

Offline Larissa238

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #5 on: January 08, 2011, 09:15:39 PM »
I'm open about my life and everything- the good, the bad, and the ugly- to try and prevent something like this:

http://gizmodo.com/5726667/the-agonizing-last-words-of-bill-zeller

This poor man was abused as a child and never had the trust to be able to tell someone. I like to think that if he had reached out to someone he knew, someone he found out was abused, that maybe... just maybe he'd still be alive today.
On why Christians and non-Christians have the same rate of divorce:

He would rather it that they worship Him, instead of spending their time on family.

Offline Bereft_of_Faith

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #6 on: January 09, 2011, 06:36:05 AM »
Larissa:

You are very open.  That is a fine quality.

May I ask the nature of the cult?  If not, no problem

As far as being at peace with yourself and getting there on your own, I think that's the only method that has any lasting meaning.  If one achieves peace through a delusion, there is always the possibility of coming to a realization about that delusion later on.

Thanks very much for sharing. -BoF

Offline Larissa238

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #7 on: January 09, 2011, 02:56:16 PM »
The cult was called the International Church of Christ. You can see some of the info here: http://www.cultwatch.com/icc.html The site says it's the ICC, but we always called it the ICOC. Minor differences, since the article is about the church I was in. The church controlled pretty much every aspect of your life. I joined them in 12th grade, and when I got into USC, I didn't think twice about going to live with the other church girls. We had our own house, 8 of us in total. If someone was converted who lived in the dorms, we would try to get them to join a "household" rather than live on their own. I didn't think about how it's easier to be controlled when you are surrounded by the cult, I just thought that everyone would want to live in one of these great houses.

They were very centered on a concept they called "discipling." Each member had a "discipler," most of the time a church member who had been with the church longer to "give advice" to the other member. When I say "advice" you can read "orders." You met with your discipler at least once a week for at least an hour. You were to confess your sins and talk about what was going on in your life.

Most of the time the relationship worked out, but not always. At USC, my first discipler was Kristen (okay, I don't really remember her name, but just think of it as names have been changed to protect them). Kristen was the daughter of one of the Elders, who were independently wealthy (they did get church money too). Kristen took me to the mall for our first discipling session to go "window shopping." She ended up spending over $100 at Abercrombie and Fitch. I was appalled. Here I am, a poor girl from the inner city, struggling on how I'm going to get groceries for the next week, and here's this girl dropping money that could feed me for a month on clothes that she didn't need. I tried talking to her about my money issues, and she said I could clean her house once a week for $100. Let's just say that relationship didn't work out.

I moved on to another discipler, Mary. Mary and I got along for the most part, and gave me a bunch of advice to be more feminine. I was a tomboy, and I was instructed to wear makeup, do my hair, and dress nice. One of the leaders went so far to say that if I kept dressing the way I did, then nobody at USC was going to respect me. So I succumbed to the pressure and tried my best. They also kept tight control over who I talked to and my relationships with others. If someone dated in the church, then they were going to get married. You could only date others in the church. If you were a leader, then you could only date other leaders in the church. Out of all the people I know who dated, only 2 didn't get married. One guy "fell away," or left the church, and the other cheated on Mary a week before their wedding (which also counts as "falling away"). I remember there was a guy I liked who I talked to on a daily basis. The next month my roommate brings the phone bill to me and tells me I'm talking to him too much. What she saw were 1-2 minute conversations on a daily basis. What I was actually doing was calling him to tell him to call me back, and then we'd talk for like an hour. But even talking to a guy in the church for 1-2 minutes a day was too much because I wasn't "ready" to date. Dating involved not only the two people in question, but their disciplers, and then also another couple to disciple them as a couple in their relationship. The disiplers had to agree that both people were "ready" to date (whatever that means) and then the guy would be given the go-ahead to ask the girl.

As you can see, everyday actions were controlled and monitored. I heard stories from other people in the church about even more control (taking away a person's paycheck and only giving them a small bit of money to use), but I don't know if those were isolated incidences or not.
On why Christians and non-Christians have the same rate of divorce:

He would rather it that they worship Him, instead of spending their time on family.

Offline kindred

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #8 on: February 04, 2011, 11:14:05 AM »
Could anybody explain to me what makes the whole "being of mexican descent" thing special.

I'm not being sarcastic here but I don't know much about racism and cultural identification so I coudn't understand the whole "brother not identifying with mexican-ness and wanting to be american" deal. I, myself, am filipino but to me that just means, the taxes that I pay for, the money I spend etc. circulate in a semi-closed economic landmass named the Philippines.

Now onto the actual post.

Larissa, why don't you conform to the cultural standards? You can always be yourself at your own time. Conforming to the cultural standards have HUGE advantages. In most cultures, the cultural ideal of a beautiful woman is very narrow as compared to the ideal handsome man which pretty much assures you of being one step ahead of other people just by virtue of being a woman.

Also, do you think of yourself as beautiful? Pardon the bluntness of the question but I find it very wierd that you can accept the fact that you got a huge handicap(visage that is far from the present definition of beautiful). I ask this question because I don't like how I look and find my overall look to be ugly but I maintain it because it is close to the present vision of what a handsome guy should look like. That leaves me puzzled as why you don't the same.
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Offline Larissa238

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #9 on: February 04, 2011, 04:10:50 PM »
Could anybody explain to me what makes the whole "being of mexican descent" thing special.

I'm not being sarcastic here but I don't know much about racism and cultural identification so I coudn't understand the whole "brother not identifying with mexican-ness and wanting to be american" deal. I, myself, am filipino but to me that just means, the taxes that I pay for, the money I spend etc. circulate in a semi-closed economic landmass named the Philippines.

My experience here in the US is that if you are different, you are bad. This goes both ways. When I was in middle school in East LA, I was one of the two "white" girls there, and was called all these derogatory names in Spanish. It didn't matter that I did have Mexican blood in me, it was that my skin was pale and I wasn't "Mexican enough". Even now, in Miami, I get people staring at me when I open my mouth and Spanish comes out. I then have to explain my family history, because I look white and therefore shouldn't be speaking Spanish. My sister lives in a mostly Mexican area, and she looks "more" Mexican, and is accepted. My brother lives in a more "American" area, and works with light-skinned people. He just Americanizes himself... I don't know why. He changes his Mexican name to the American version. My sister has a very Mexican name (I would tell you, but it's the internet and all.. but her name is T-E-M-Y-G, the standard Mexican version of a name- T, her given name, E, her baptism name, M, her middle name, Y, her maiden name, and G, her married name. She goes by her whole name, all 5 of them.)

Quote
Now onto the actual post.

Larissa, why don't you conform to the cultural standards? You can always be yourself at your own time. Conforming to the cultural standards have HUGE advantages. In most cultures, the cultural ideal of a beautiful woman is very narrow as compared to the ideal handsome man which pretty much assures you of being one step ahead of other people just by virtue of being a woman.

Also, do you think of yourself as beautiful? Pardon the bluntness of the question but I find it very wierd that you can accept the fact that you got a huge handicap(visage that is far from the present definition of beautiful). I ask this question because I don't like how I look and find my overall look to be ugly but I maintain it because it is close to the present vision of what a handsome guy should look like. That leaves me puzzled as why you don't the same.

This question comes at an odd time. Had you asked me 3 days ago if I think I'm beautiful, I would have answered without hesitation "yes". Even now, I do think I'm beautiful (but in the past 3 days I have come to an epiphany on my mental state, a discussion not for this forum). I have no problem posting pictures of myself, with or without makeup. I don't mind whole-body shots (with clothes on) even when I was at my heaviest.

I mean, look at me. I'm damn pretty. This was last week, no makeup. I just took my glasses off.


Me celebrating Geo's bday with his family (2 years ago):


Me, at the proudest moment of my whole life- Graduating from USC-


You can look at those all you like, but when I see myself, I see a beautiful, confident woman. Why should I see myself as anything different if my culture says so? Fuck them.

For that matter, why should I hide anything that I am (unless it's for work, where I could lose my job)? Why should I have to conform to a society that prides itself on hiding every single bad thing about yourself? I scare people off because I'm real. Fuck them. If you can't handle me, then you don't deserve to be near me. I'm mentally ill. So what? To me it's the same as saying I have diabetes or cancer. It's a physical problem that I have to deal with by taking my medicine. I love myself some vagina and boobs. So what? I was born that way.

I have realized that I see the world differently than everyone else. I don't know how or why I got this way, all I know is that I'm that way. I can look at someone who is seen as pretty, and just see their attitude and think they are butt-ugly. I used to work with this bitch that was dating the manager. I had my friend go to the bitch's facebook to get the screen shot of her and the boss together before the bitch could take it down, and my friend remarked on how pretty the bitch was. I never saw her that way, once. I just see bitch when I look at her. How I perceive a person as attractive or not has to do with their attitude, not their appearance. You can look at my hubby- I find him very attractive. Most people wouldn't agree with me, but who gives a fuck what they think? He's *my* husband, *I* married him, and *I* love him.





He's not the picture of American handsome-ness, but something about him actually got a lesbian to marry him. Go figure, huh? He just has the most beautiful soul I have seen. *That's* what I see when I look at him- I see the inside. Yes, I like his outside, but I love him for what's inside.

Why not just be myself on my own time? I spent too many years trying to conform to the standards and just got more and more fucked up. I had eating disorders, I started cutting myself, I got so depressed I tried to kill myself... so I decided fuck them. If I want to be myself, then I'm going to be my own damn self and fuck everyone else who doesn't like it that way.
On why Christians and non-Christians have the same rate of divorce:

He would rather it that they worship Him, instead of spending their time on family.

Offline Brenda

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #10 on: February 04, 2011, 04:40:53 PM »
You go girl! Great answer, and I feel the same as you a lot of ways.

 ;)


Offline Larissa238

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #11 on: February 04, 2011, 04:54:16 PM »
Thanks Brenda! I'm a person of truth. Why lie about who I am?
On why Christians and non-Christians have the same rate of divorce:

He would rather it that they worship Him, instead of spending their time on family.

Offline anastasis

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #12 on: March 29, 2011, 05:24:38 PM »

You can look at those all you like, but when I see myself, I see a beautiful, confident woman. Why should I see myself as anything different if my culture says so? Fuck them.

For that matter, why should I hide anything that I am (unless it's for work, where I could lose my job)? Why should I have to conform to a society that prides itself on hiding every single bad thing about yourself? I scare people off because I'm real. Fuck them. If you can't handle me, then you don't deserve to be near me. I'm mentally ill. So what? To me it's the same as saying I have diabetes or cancer. It's a physical problem that I have to deal with by taking my medicine. I love myself some vagina and boobs. So what? I was born that way.


Why not just be myself on my own time? I spent too many years trying to conform to the standards and just got more and more fucked up. I had eating disorders, I started cutting myself, I got so depressed I tried to kill myself... so I decided fuck them. If I want to be myself, then I'm going to be my own damn self and fuck everyone else who doesn't like it that way.

"Fuck them"
That's the spirit.Who gives a shit about what others think?
« Last Edit: March 29, 2011, 05:38:00 PM by anastasis »

Offline kindred

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #13 on: April 02, 2011, 09:26:20 PM »
@Larissa

A few criticsms:

Your reasons are too emotional. You are doing away with conformity because you have been hurt, not because you understand when they are wrong to implement.

You also seem to have warped the meaning of beauty to be able to call yourself beautiful. I'm not implying you are ugly but it seems to me that you are ignoring the mental image of what is beautiful in your head and redefining beauty as an attitude to make yourself feel better.

Not to seem like a downer but to a guy like me who's arbitrary purpose in life is to be as close as possible to my own definition of badass, you seem to be an average person. You also seem to not handle strees very well(PSTD because of suicide).

Feel free to comment and clear up misunderstandings, maybe this thread'll live again.

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Offline Gnu Ordure

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #14 on: April 02, 2011, 09:44:51 PM »
kindred, when are you going to stop being such a jerk?



Offline Larissa238

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #15 on: April 09, 2011, 08:59:09 PM »
@Larissa

A few criticsms:

Your reasons are too emotional. You are doing away with conformity because you have been hurt, not because you understand when they are wrong to implement.

I don't conform because I don't want to, and plus I have my own odd definition of things to make sense in my mind. Oh well.

Quote
You also seem to have warped the meaning of beauty to be able to call yourself beautiful. I'm not implying you are ugly but it seems to me that you are ignoring the mental image of what is beautiful in your head and redefining beauty as an attitude to make yourself feel better.


As they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. In my eyes (and Geo's) I'm beautiful. Isn't that all that matters? Besides, I see beauty as something on the inside, not totally the outside. A woman can have the hottest body on earth, but if she is a bitch, then all I will see is bitch and not a pretty woman. My beauty comes not only from the outside, but the inside as well.

Quote
Not to seem like a downer but to a guy like me who's arbitrary purpose in life is to be as close as possible to my own definition of badass, you seem to be an average person. You also seem to not handle strees very well(PSTD because of suicide).

Feel free to comment and clear up misunderstandings, maybe this thread'll live again.

I don't handle stress well. I'm mentally ill. That happens. I may not be badass, but I'm happy with myself the way I am. Isn't that what life should be? Why should I be unhappy with myself if I'm fine? I don't like my weight just because of the possible health risks (currently my weight is not affecting anything medically- I have tests done regularly). I dare you to find another overweight woman who is happy with her body- or even a woman at a regular weight. Women are brainwashed to be uncomfortable with themselves- I think that's horrible.

kindred, when are you going to stop being such a jerk?

Eh, he's not the first. Most people have some sort of negative reaction to something I do. It happens. I don't fit neatly into a box, and I don't want to. People have problems with that. Heck, I have problems when people don't fit the labels I want them to- it's just human.
On why Christians and non-Christians have the same rate of divorce:

He would rather it that they worship Him, instead of spending their time on family.

Offline voodoo child

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #16 on: April 09, 2011, 09:33:10 PM »
um, you ever thought about writing a book? you do know tragedy sells.

it may be a inspiration to many..

just my two cents.  ;)
The classical man is just a bundle of routine, ideas and tradition. If you follow the classical pattern, you are understanding the routine, the tradition, the shadow, you are not understanding yourself. Truth has no path. Truth is living and therefore changing. Bruce lee

Offline kindred

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #17 on: April 09, 2011, 10:22:38 PM »
Light: Just as planned *stares menacingly into the camera*
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Offline xphobe

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #18 on: April 09, 2011, 10:49:16 PM »
let me tell you, there's nothing like a lesbian-love triangle where all the people involved are mentally ill.

For some reason, this sentence made me lol :)

Interesting bio, Larissa.  Thanks for sharing.

I'm signing up for this thread mainly to see where Kindred is going with his angle.  It's a little surprising - I don't think I've ever even seen Nam be such an asshole, and he revels in assholery.
I stopped believing for a little while this morning. Journey is gonna be so pissed when they find out...

Offline kindred

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #19 on: April 10, 2011, 12:51:34 AM »

I'm signing up for this thread mainly to see where Kindred is going with his angle.  It's a little surprising - I don't think I've ever even seen Nam be such an asshole, and he revels in assholery.
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LOL. I'm just trying to drum up attention to this thread. Nothing makes people want to tune in more than a card-carrying villain that does things because he's evil.

In all seriousness and without the trolling, my worldview is just as arbitrary and equally stupid or smart as Larissa's. We all just make up values or subscribe to premade ones and then live our lives deriving happiness from said values.
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Offline Larissa238

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Re: A bit about Larissa
« Reply #20 on: April 10, 2011, 02:01:22 PM »
LOL. I'm just trying to drum up attention to this thread. Nothing makes people want to tune in more than a card-carrying villain that does things because he's evil.

In all seriousness and without the trolling, my worldview is just as arbitrary and equally stupid or smart as Larissa's. We all just make up values or subscribe to premade ones and then live our lives deriving happiness from said values.

I don't think that there's anything really wrong with that. I don't see Kindred as being an asshole- he's not asking me anything I haven't been asked or noticed before. I don't take insult to being called crazy or anything. I know I'm crazy, and I'm fine with it. Although, I don't know if I should be grateful to him for resurrecting this thread. I'm honest and open about my life- the good and the bad. Sometimes the ugly, to people who I think can handle it, at times when I think I can handle it. I think the more people who are mentally ill talk about their illness, the less stigma it has. So I'm open about it, and all the crazy things I think. I don't care what people think, or troll. I had some online stalkers who went around posting how crazy I was over the sites we were on, and that made me feel more open. Heck, if everyone already knows I have problems, then why not talk about them? Plus, I just love to talk!
On why Christians and non-Christians have the same rate of divorce:

He would rather it that they worship Him, instead of spending their time on family.