Author Topic: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)  (Read 7021 times)

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Offline RaymondKHessel

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #116 on: September 10, 2011, 08:44:58 PM »
go to hell if you want, GOD gave us all free choice, act smart and say you dont need God, after all GODS free gift to mankind was "CHOICE" right, you live in a democratic society dumb get it, you made choices you will be affected by them, good or bad, after all  you can program the computer to say I LOVE YOU to yourself, but does it really love you? No, same with God, God actually thought about already, he took the risk, he wanted us to say with the free gift of choice and feelings to say "I LOVE YOU JESUS' or worse "I dont need you" im happy i can thank God from my heart, though i feel sorry for you

A few observations here, if I may.

A.)You are one seriously unpleasant, tightly-wound, tight-assed, nasty little shithead. Why would anybody want to listen to you?

Hold on to your magic zombie on a stick, big boy. He'll whisper sweet nothings into your ear when the bullies at school are flushing your bulbous head in the toilets.

Because with your horrible spelling, grammar, uncalled for hostility, brain-washed blabbering, "I'm 15 years old and know everything", "my imaginary friend will GET YOU and if he doesn't I'll physically assault you"-attitude... It's going to be an invitation for ass-kickings and prison rape for the rest of your life.

The majority of people here don't believe in your god or Jesus any more than they do the Tooth Fairy or Captain Planet or Leprechauns. That being the case, why would anyone care if you threaten them with something they don't believe in?

If I told you that Magneto or Dracula or the Boogieman was going to come get you in the middle of the night, would it scare you? Exact same thing here. I'm a grown ass man. I worry about my bills. Not magical red goat men with pointy horns and tails and pitchforks, or threats from the dim-witted emissary of some 5,000 year old desert god who collects foreskins. (That would be you. And your god.)

You DO know your god demands people cut off the skin at the end of their dick, right? Why do you worship a god that wants to cut off the skin at the end of a every baby's dick? Does that seem like something that would be important to a GOD?

Don't believe me? Go ask your mommy. It's called "circumcision."  They did it to you, too, when you were a baby. Pretty cool, right? Who WOULDN'T believe that the all-powerful creator of the universe wants you to cut up your dick? Makes perfect sense! If I was a god, I'd do the same thing! Maybe have people put pinecones in their buttholes while I'm at it! Why not? LMAO  ;D

Look, your pubes just came in, for the love of Zeus. Your voice is probably still squeaky. I have pairs of shoes older than you, Mighty Mouse. Why would anybody take anything you say seriously? But no, really, you and your goofy ass Special-Ed "debate" skills are REALLY impressive. Especially being threatend by a 15 year old lol. Really intimidating. I'm sure I'm not the only one you've converted with your silky-smooth conversational abilities. I'm totally down for Jesus now. Sign me up. Hallelujah! I believe! I believe!!!

Umm... Jesus does give handjobs, right? 'Cos, you know, I heard he loves me...
 
B.)Yahweh (your god) is a "warrior" now? AHHAHAHAHAHA... Your preacher told you that, I'm assuming? So is he trained in Krav Maga or something? Does he do knife fighting? That would be sweeet.

Maybe you should actually read your giant, boring holy book sometime (though it's painfully obvious that "reading" and "books" in general really aren't your thing)... Because your "warrior" god Yahweh also encourages rape, slavery, mass murder, racism, animal sacrifice, having sex with children, raping children, and killing babies, among other things. And you think YOU'RE a sinner because you ran from some cops? Believe me, when it comes to EVIL, you've got NOTHING on the god you worship. But ooooooh! A three-star wanted level! You're SUCH a rebel! What an exciting and totally believable story!

You play too many goddamn videogames, sonny-boy. It's cool that you're willing to lie for Jesus though.  ;D

C.)Your religion has made you certifiably fucking INSANE. Seriously. I'm not joking. Go back and read what you wrote. Temper tantrums are for 4 year olds. Maybe whining and screaming and crying and stamping your feet makes your teacher let you out of class when you have to go potty, but it's a piss poor way of convincing adults of your opinion.

You need to seek professional help for your aggression and anger management classes. I think you also might have split personalities.

For real dude. You type like you're retarded, all you do is ramble and insult people and CAPITALIZE LETTERZ 4 EMPHASIS, and you have no fucking clue about your religion, or what you're even talking about.

You've bought the bullshit your preachers have sold you hook, line, and sinker, and it's obvious you've never actually READ the bible that you're so obsessed with. Which I'm sure makes them THRILLED, because they know that by getting you so into Christianity at such a young age, you're going to provide a lifetime of money for them.

You're a sucker kid. A chump. A rube. You're in a giant cult. Get with the program before it's too late, otherwise you're going to spend the rest of your life being told what to believe by other people and you'll never actually think for yourself.

I don't think that will happen though. It's obvious you're not very bright, and poorly educated, so coupled with your borderline personality disorders, you're probably doomed.

So that being the case, can we just skip right to the part where you lose your mind and start screaming "YOU'RE ALL THE DEVIL! YOU'LL ROAST IN FIRE! MY LOVING GOD WILL TORTURE YOU FOR FOREVER. But I'll pray for you." and then leave this forum forever in a big crying, weepy, angry blubber-fest? 

Because your "debate" with Blaz was fucking embarassing to watch, and this is a grown-up website for grown folks to have big-boy discussions.

And you're so clearly not capable of behaving like an adult, you're only making your bogus fairy-tale religion look worse than it already does.

« Last Edit: September 10, 2011, 09:23:20 PM by RaymondKHessel »
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Offline Ivellios

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #117 on: September 10, 2011, 09:21:41 PM »

Not magical red goat men with pointy horns and tails and pitchforks, or threats from the dim-witted emissary of some 5,000 year old desert god who collects foreskins. (That would be you. And your god.)

You DO know your god demands people cut off the skin at the end of their dick, right? Why do you worship a god that wants to cut off the skin at the end of a every baby's dick? Does that seem like something that would be important to a GOD?

Don't believe me? Go ask your mommy. It's called "circumcision."  They did it to you, too, when you were a baby. Pretty cool, right? Who WOULDN'T believe that the all-powerful creator of the universe wants you to cut up your dick? Makes perfect sense! If I was a god, I'd do the same thing! Maybe have people put pinecones in their buttholes while I'm at it! Why not? LMAO  ;D

God - Oops, in my All-Knowingness and All-Poewefulness I made a mistake creating your penis. I also just happened to make it the most sensitive part of your body. No, no need to thank me, because I need you to chop it off. Yes you heard me right! I could do it, but I want you to. Just do it. OBEY ME!
male - OWWWW!
God - Mmmmmm, I love meself some foreskins. Mmmmmmm.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2011, 09:25:02 PM by TruthSeeker »

Offline RaymondKHessel

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #118 on: September 10, 2011, 09:25:19 PM »
^^^^^ LULZ  ;D :laugh:

I always liked to imagine that he stitches them all together into a giant throne, with stacks of Egyptian baby bones for a footrest.  :P
« Last Edit: September 10, 2011, 09:34:41 PM by RaymondKHessel »
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Offline Mr. Blackwell

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #119 on: September 10, 2011, 09:51:24 PM »
...and magic buttons on my forehead and skull, and fractured bones, but lucky i didnt get caught,...

What are magic buttons?
Good night Blaziken, i hoped you thought it was a very interesting debate with me

I think I missed something...debate? But seriously, let me give you some bad advice. Since God's law obviously trumps Man's law, and you are a spray can toting warrior for God, and he has shown you favor in support for your criminal behavior; I think you should go on a crime spree since you got the ultimate wing man. Amiright?
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Offline Astreja

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #120 on: September 11, 2011, 01:04:46 AM »
Blaziken, ur really a stonehead, dont take pride, ur really a baby sense dude, grow up and stop blocking Gods love for you...

The "love" of a god that would create an eternal hell is meaningless.  It is forever tainted by the pain of the sentient beings it tortures.

Quote
He could offer you more than your earthly father ever could, he could fill up the gap in your heart that nothing of this world could ever do,

**bonks the troll with Her Clue-By-Four™**

Apologize without qualification to all of us whose fathers you have slandered.  No excuses, just "I'm sorry for insulting your fathers."

And dump the silly idea that you can read minds and determine the contents of someone else's "hearts" (which normally contain blood, the last time I checked).

Quote
FOR MAN CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT PURPOSE AND WITHOUT GOD...

False dichotomy.  In My opinion, every person who has ever walked the earth has lived "without God," as there is no good evidence for the existence of such a being.

As for purpose, IMO it exists in the present moment only and is 100% subjective.  No gods are required in order to have meaning in one's life.

Quote
get down and repent for your God waits patiently, HE will not count your sins, Give God a chance in your life, He will never fail you at all

Tell that to the amputees of this world, kid.  WWGHA?
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Offline 12 Monkeys

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #121 on: September 12, 2011, 09:39:24 AM »
 Could I borrow the clue-by-four?

 These people have used a "god" figure for centuries to justify the horrible things they do.  They point at the mess they make of humanity,instead of taking responsibility,they say "God told us it was right and just,we had to obey his commands".
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Offline 12 Monkeys

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #122 on: September 12, 2011, 09:44:55 AM »
^^^^^ LULZ  ;D :laugh:

I always liked to imagine that he stitches them all together into a giant throne, with stacks of Egyptian baby bones for a footrest.  :P
Do you think he makes lamp-shades?
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Offline 12 Monkeys

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #123 on: September 12, 2011, 09:46:40 AM »
World is gonna really turn you upside down and crush you, but this all will mean nothing, they are a waste of time, you will take nothing with you after you die, for you naked you came into this world, naked you'll go back to God
Then why do you care? Fuck off in a corner and wait for the end.
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Offline velkyn

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #124 on: September 12, 2011, 12:48:25 PM »
go to hell if you want, GOD gave us all free choice, act smart and say you dont need God, after all GODS free gift to mankind was "CHOICE" right, you live in a democratic society dumb get it, you made choices you will be affected by them, good or bad, after all  you can program the computer to say I LOVE YOU to yourself, but does it really love you? No, same with God, God actually thought about already, he took the risk, he wanted us to say with the free gift of choice and feelings to say "I LOVE YOU JESUS' or worse "I dont need you" im happy i can thank God from my heart, though i feel sorry for you

It's always interesting to see some humans, be they teenagers or not, glom on to the fear and hatred that Christianity offers.

GW, I would suggest actually reading your bible, and not getting your schtick from someone else.  No, your god doesn't give free choice.  Your god said that it intentionally makes sure that some people will never be able to choose.  Romans 9 has it, JC says it in Matthew 13, etc. Now, if your god is omnipotent and omniscient, no puny human will ever be able to fight that.  So, no "Free will".  No "choice". 

You don't need to feel sorry for me at all.  But you do need to think about a god that would damn people for no more reason than it just felt like it.  Is this god truly loving?  Or is it just a brat that wants to get its own way just like any other god created in that era? 

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Offline jtp56

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #125 on: September 12, 2011, 07:37:23 PM »
OK - time to open a can of worms.  (Be gentle - I'm a newbie.)
A few reactions to some of the comments I've read here - in no particular order:
1/  This science that you place so much faith in - Is that the same science that declared the world is flat?  That the earth is the center of the universe?  That the atom is the smallest particle of matter?  What "facts" that science clings to today will be found to be false tomorrow?

sup you are the reason why i troll

the bible declared the world was flat and earth is the center of the universe, and when scientists corrected the bible, the church got pissed off.     in other words the big difference between morons such as yourself and people such as myself is summarized nicely by this pic  ......



in conclusion, you are an idiot.   please never ever reproduce.

Question, where did "get an idea" come from?
Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools.

For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.

Offline Ivellios

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #126 on: September 12, 2011, 07:58:46 PM »
For starters: Why is the sky blue?

A) Science answer, has to do with the angle light enters the atmosphere and it filters out the longer and shorter wavelengths of light.
b) Bible answer: There's this firmament[1] that holds back the "waters above[2]" and you can see the water the firmament is holding back.

One allows for changes incase something doesn't match reality. The other you must believe or burn in hell forever, after all, if you don't believe it, you're calling your All-Knowing God a liar and that he doesn't know how he made the Earth. Science vs. Faith.
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Offline Brakeman

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #127 on: September 13, 2011, 05:53:42 AM »
I think that the bountiful love of god is well exemplified in the story in 2 Samuel where the cart that carries the Arc of the covenant is tipped by a pothole and for saving the Arc from being smashed, righteous man Uzzah is smote and arguably sent to hell, because he touched the Arc to save it.

That is definitely a father's love! Don't you agree JPT56?

Wouldn't you do the same for your children?
« Last Edit: September 13, 2011, 05:55:39 AM by Brakeman »
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Offline Ivellios

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #128 on: September 13, 2011, 06:15:40 AM »
When I was in Church the explanation they gave was God demands your outright obedience. Doesn't matter if you do the "right thing" if it involves God himself saying, "Thou shall not..." Obedience over Compassion. So yes, God would rather everything be ruined than you to disobey even for a milisecond. He proves this with his harsh punishments.

Yet Christians seem to think that "white lies" aren't that bad.

Offline velkyn

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #129 on: September 13, 2011, 10:05:17 AM »
Question, where did "get an idea" come from?

the human brain.  It loves to find patterns and "reasons".  It just got the idea of "god" wrong. 

Unless of course you'd like to show evidence of your god and how it's the "only" one as opposed to the thousands of gods that humans have had. 
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Offline screwtape

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #130 on: September 13, 2011, 03:28:22 PM »
Question, where did "get an idea" come from?

Oh, shit.  It must be...god?  Which means, if our thoughts are not our own, that we must be...puppets?  Man.  You really got us there.
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Offline Ambassador Pony

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #131 on: September 13, 2011, 04:11:58 PM »
Question, where did "get an idea" come from?

Your ineptitude is an imposition on me.

You need to apologize.
You believe evolution and there is no evidence for that. Where is the fossil record of a half man half ape. I've only ever heard about it in reading.

Offline Historicity

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #132 on: September 13, 2011, 05:40:42 PM »
All these unnecessary responses to God's Warrior. 

He admitted he is a 15 year old kid and a juvenile delinquent.

He hasn't been back.  I have a theory about that.  I think his father has grounded him again and his mother has taken away his internet privileges.

Offline Ambassador Pony

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #133 on: September 13, 2011, 05:58:12 PM »
What does GodsWarrior offer that is different than jtp56? One is a grown adult, the other an ignorant child, yet they offer the same imbecilic nonsense. They are equally immune to whatever objectivity or sense is required critically to examine their own point of view. It's pathetic, and sad, of course, but I don't see why one's voice need necessarily be ignored over the other.

 



 

You believe evolution and there is no evidence for that. Where is the fossil record of a half man half ape. I've only ever heard about it in reading.

Offline velkyn

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #134 on: September 14, 2011, 09:18:21 AM »
^^^Indeed.  We get the same nonsense no matter the claimed age or educational level.  Hopefully, and I know this is very likely a very vain hope, all theists would read the responses and consider that they apply to them too, not just the particular theist addressed.  They have very few differences and they should, not that they do, consider why they would find someone else's claims ridiculous but not their own similar ones.
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Offline Benny

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #135 on: September 14, 2011, 02:00:42 PM »
Question, where did "get an idea" come from?

Your ineptitude is an imposition on me.

You need to apologize.
I believe I also deserve an apology from jtp56, for having read that tidbit of stupidity that will never be erased from my young brain.

On second thought, this is typical Christian, not knowing where ideas come from...
Gay atheist teen.  But none of that should matter.

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Offline Astreja

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #136 on: September 14, 2011, 06:03:24 PM »
Could I borrow the clue-by-four?

Já, sure... But be careful; it's made of solid oak and weighs 4 or 5 pounds.
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Offline caveat_imperator

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #137 on: September 17, 2011, 10:38:07 AM »
SRY dude, to be truthful wit u, IM 15...
Ah, no wonder the crap you post makes you sound like an immature douchebag.

...but im more mature compared to you...
No you aren't, obviously. And now you get to live with the knowledge that the mental diarrhea you posted will be forever online for everyone to point and laugh at.
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Offline WiccaBillinCo

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Re: Proving that Jesus is Imaginary (in one simple step!)
« Reply #138 on: September 30, 2011, 04:24:54 PM »
I think the question of religion is more complicated than "Is any of it right/correct/truthful?".

While there's a lot of crap associated with religion, there's good too.  Some theists use it as a reason to help other people; charities are often loosely-inspired religious organizations; there are countries where the living conditions are so harsh that a simple thing like "hope" is useful/productive for the people living there.

I'd have to disagree a bit.  I find that theists do not have charities to help people any more than non-believers.   I do find that they use their charities to enlarge their "herd" so they get even more external validation.  I'm not sure how "hope" helps much when that hope is never rewarded.

I have to agree with Velkyn fully on this one. My personal choice on charity is to help animals. This is a personal choice by me and not to make anyone mad. I have found that many of the so-called “christian” charities are to buy someone at the top a nice home and car. Please note I said many, not all. There are a lot of good people out there that want to help others, but my personal experiences have been that I have found more “christians” diverting funds to themselves then non-christians. Perhaps I have run into a school of bad christians, and my sight is tainted, I can’t say for sure. In the animal rescue field there are many good people, christian and non christian alike, and a few bad ones. All I’m saying that calling your self a christian does not give you a sole claim on charity, and in fact, makes you suspect in  my book, and maybe you will have to prove yourself before you can get a hold of any of my cash. Free will, ain't it a bitch?