Author Topic: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...  (Read 494 times)

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Online ThatZenoGuy

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Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« on: April 05, 2016, 10:35:45 AM »
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!

*Punts singers*

No singing!

Anyhow, put bluntly, the total lack of evidence of any sort of divine being.

Really not much else to add...

*Non-Serious reasons follow*

To start with, there is a total lack of super powers.
Life is so boring, no divine being makes a boring world where no-one can fire lasers from their eyes!

There is also no furries, erm, not the people in suits, the literal animal people.
Really should not explain that one...

Infinite Chocolate Pudding machine are also seemingly missing, as is the infinite DrPepper vendors.
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline eh!

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2016, 03:15:46 PM »
Well how do you explain fluffy kittens and sunsets without god?
some skepisms,
1. "I have not seen God. I have felt the invisible presence"
2. What if there is a rock in the middle of a road, a blind person is speeding towards it, ...they say that they can't see it.   Would you recommend him to keep speeding?

Offline ParkingPlaces

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #2 on: April 05, 2016, 06:44:28 PM »
Ah, but don't you see. The lack of evidence is proof that there is a supreme being, because any being that was less than supreme would, even if only accidentally, leave evidence. Since there is none at all, that is something that only a supreme being can do.

Some people see the lack of evidence as evidence that there is no supreme being. That's like saying conspiracy theories are proof that there are no conspiracy theories. Let the obvious be obvious and stop trying to second guess our illustrious, inevident supreme being, who is way too busy being anonymous to have time to reveal himself anyway.

Oh, and some of us have superpowers (myself included) but none us are so frickin' insecure that we feel a need to run at the speed of light or see through clothing or nonchalantly toss army tanks over our green shoulders. Let alone fire lasers out of our eyes. That's the sort of thing only authors of fictional comic books make up, and that's because they don't have superpowers and they're just guessing how they would be used. And they're way wrong.

But go ahead and be an atheist. It is all part of his master plan, which includes instilling doubt in a large enough percentage of the population that it causes true believers to think (or at least try to think) and then to draw their own faulty conclusions about his existence, which promotes both inept customization of religions and infighting amongst the loyals. Because what fun is it to be a supreme being if lots of people don't die because of you? I mean, a few folks with superpowers are no justification for using ones supreme abilities. Dead people, on the other hand, make the whole endeavor worthwhile.

What better way to know that you're a supreme being than being able to watch folks die fighting over you. And no, that's not ego tripping. Supreme beings don't have egos. Well, at least the one I've never seen doesn't.

What I lack in sophistication I make up for with other shortcomings.

Online ThatZenoGuy

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #3 on: April 06, 2016, 02:55:19 AM »
Well how do you explain fluffy kittens and sunsets without god?

Obviously Satan made those.
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline Fiji

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #4 on: April 06, 2016, 03:18:15 AM »
Anyhow, put bluntly, the total lack of evidence of any sort of divine being.

Really not much else to add...
Spot on.

... also ...

He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
He's going to tell! He's going to tell!
Thought you could sneak that by me, ey, you crafty bugger?

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Online ThatZenoGuy

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #5 on: April 06, 2016, 03:21:55 AM »
Well I figured I might as well add in a Monty Python reference! ;D
Rule 1: No pooftas. Rule 2: No maltreating the theists, IF, anyone is watching. Rule 3: No pooftas. Rule 4: I do not want to see anyone NOT drinking after light out. Rule 5: No pooftas. Rule 6: There is NO...rule 6.

Offline jynnan tonnix

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #6 on: April 06, 2016, 10:18:54 PM »
Ah, but don't you see. The lack of evidence is proof that there is a supreme being, because any being that was less than supreme would, even if only accidentally, leave evidence. Since there is none at all, that is something that only a supreme being can do.

Sounds rather like "Babelfish as proof of God" reasoning...

Works for me!  As satire, anyway :)

Offline Fiji

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #7 on: April 07, 2016, 01:42:15 AM »
yet, when you look at what argument god's hooligans come up with ... like Aquinas ... it's THAT LEVEL OF REASONING!
Go figure.
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Offline YouCantHandleTheTruth

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #8 on: May 16, 2016, 12:31:54 PM »


Quote
Anyhow, put bluntly, the total lack of evidence of any sort of divine being.

Definitely - if we could fly, I'd believe in God.  Why can't we fly??  That's BS - come on God, you let birds fly, and yet we can't?  I thought we had domain over everyone??  Why did you make us create airplanes??  I want to fly!!

Offline nogodsforme

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Re: Why am I an Atheist? Well...I'll tell you...
« Reply #9 on: May 16, 2016, 05:26:10 PM »
God knows where we are, and knows how to convince us, yet he does not bother. He goes into prisons and convinces hardened killers. He slaps people silly with burning bushes, healed cancer, NDE's, demonic writing and flying plates. But not us mild-mannered nerdy atheists and heathens typing stuff on blogs.

Either he does not care whether we believe or not. Or he does not exist.
When all of Cinderella's finery changed back at midnight, why didn't the shoes disappear? What's up with that?