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Author Topic: i need help [#444]  (Read 716 times)

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Offline DL

i need help [#444]
« on: September 21, 2008, 01:14:42 PM »

hey man i love your videos, they are awsome releif at the end of the day.
anyway , my girlfriend is a christian, and i wanna not so much convert her, but to at least tell her my beleifs without her gettin pissed. i dont know mabye you could help me?
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Offline StPatrick

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #1 on: September 21, 2008, 01:27:33 PM »
Kindly tell her how you feel and why?

Why not drop by the forums?  Maybe we can discuss something here.
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Offline Hermes

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #2 on: September 21, 2008, 01:34:02 PM »
Quote from: DL on September 21, 2008, 01:14:42 PM
mabye you could help me?

Come on over to the forums ... that's often a tough one!


Recommendation: Do *not* try and deconvert her.  Religions are popular cults.  Almost anything you say will be seen as an attack, even things you think are mild and honest.  If *she* brings it up, there are some simple things you can say for many situations that will take the air out of her religious programming.
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Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons. --Michael Shermer

The history of religion is a long attempt to reconcile old custom with new reason, to find a sound theory for an absurd practice.  --Sir James George Frazer

Offline Freak

Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #3 on: September 21, 2008, 02:12:34 PM »
My opinion is that you're fucked. A person can't be religious without a disconnect in their brain. There is nothing simple you can do to fix that disconnect. I think you need to make it clear that you are an atheist, but you will not judge her because of her beliefs, and you expect the same of her. At that point it will become clear pretty quick whether or not the relationship is going to work. If it's not going to work, it likely never would have worked.
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Offline Irish

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #4 on: September 21, 2008, 02:19:59 PM »
Come by the forums and we can all talk

But here's my two cents, for what it's worth:

I don't think that religion should come between people.  I you sat down and honestly told her what you believe and why, and she rejects for that, then she is just superficial and can't see past your new "roadblock" of atheism.  If she truly cared about you then she wouldn't just see you with a huge A above your head.
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Offline GotMooo

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #5 on: September 21, 2008, 05:09:35 PM »
Absolutely correct.  True love will be shown if you two are able to get past these differences.  If you don't workout then you simply weren't meant to be.

True Love is unconditional.
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Offline Shakaib

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #6 on: September 24, 2008, 08:31:56 AM »
Say to her, "Let's Both become Muslims". It works (I hope so)
« Last Edit: September 24, 2008, 12:16:12 PM by Shakaib »
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Offline velkyn

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #7 on: September 24, 2008, 09:51:25 AM »
Quote from: DL on September 21, 2008, 01:14:42 PM

hey man i love your videos, they are awsome releif at the end of the day.
anyway , my girlfriend is a christian, and i wanna not so much convert her, but to at least tell her my beleifs without her gettin pissed. i dont know mabye you could help me?

Why would she get angry?  If she can't accept you as you are, then perhaps your relationship isn't that great.  Tell her that you are an atheist.  If she asks why, show her the main website and the video.  Say "This is why, what do you think?"  She may not have considered the problems wtih religion and understand.  She may not. 
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Offline Hermes

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #8 on: September 24, 2008, 10:23:22 AM »
Quote from: Shakaib on September 24, 2008, 08:31:56 AM
Say to her, "Let's noth become Muslims". It works (I hope so)

Don't mind the stray Muslim or three.  For some reason, they think this web site has something to do with them them.
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Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons. --Michael Shermer

The history of religion is a long attempt to reconcile old custom with new reason, to find a sound theory for an absurd practice.  --Sir James George Frazer

Offline Shakaib

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #9 on: September 24, 2008, 12:16:49 PM »
if you realize that the letter "N" is next door to the letter "B". Therefore I meant to say let's "BOTH" not NOTH! lol
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Offline whiteouTT420

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #10 on: October 03, 2008, 01:13:02 AM »
To many people, religion is a big part of their life.  At my church, they say that you should only date other Christians.  I don't really believe too much in that, obviously since I dated this girl who was polytheistic.  I don't remember what she was exactly, but she was like a druid and believed in all the nature gods and stuff, but that didn't affect our relationship.  The only thing you have to think about is how big a deal her religion is in her life.  She will definitely be pressured into either converting you or dumping you, so if she's really big in God it might be really difficult.  Also, I dislike you calling religions cults.  Although it is true in it's own way, a cult is generally deemed as a mass suicide ending.  All religions that I know of are against suicide.   
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Offline velkyn

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #11 on: October 03, 2008, 09:32:20 AM »
Quote from: whiteouTT420 on October 03, 2008, 01:13:02 AM
To many people, religion is a big part of their life.  At my church, they say that you should only date other Christians.  I don't really believe too much in that, obviously since I dated this girl who was polytheistic.  I don't remember what she was exactly, but she was like a druid and believed in all the nature gods and stuff, but that didn't affect our relationship.  The only thing you have to think about is how big a deal her religion is in her life.  She will definitely be pressured into either converting you or dumping you, so if she's really big in God it might be really difficult.  Also, I dislike you calling religions cults.  Although it is true in it's own way, a cult is generally deemed as a mass suicide ending.  All religions that I know of are against suicide.   

untrue about the defintion of cult. 

1: formal religious veneration : worship
2: a system of religious beliefs and ritual ; also : its body of adherents
3: a religion regarded as unorthodox or spurious ; also : its body of adherents http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/cult

There are many cults that have not gone the suicide route.  People seem to deem a religion a cult if they don't agree with it. 
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Offline Irish

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Re: i need help [#444]
« Reply #12 on: October 03, 2008, 03:41:23 PM »
Different definitions of cult from the dictionary:

1.) a particular system of religious worship, esp. with reference to its rites and ceremonies.
2.) a religion or sect considered to be false, unorthodox, or extremist, with members often living outside of conventional society under the direction of a charismatic leader
3.) A system or community of religious worship and ritual
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